Football Page 1439 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Stafon Johnson Appreciates The Ironic T-Shirt
USC running back Stafon Johnson seems to be doing pretty well, considering he was nearly decapitated by a barbell just days ago. Well enough to pose for pictures with his matching tracheostomy tube and weightlifting t-shirt, anyway....

Tim Tebow Lives!
His headache is gone so the big guy will likely play tonight against LSU. Will he start or arrive by parachute in the fourth quarter for added chills? [Times-Union]...

Your Mid-Afternoon Football Update: Bradford Goes Down. Again.
Hey, TV people! Way to balance the schedule today. All those early blowouts were awesome! I was forced to watch ESPNews for entertainment, for cryin' out loud. (Although, their numerous live look-ins were very exciting.)...

Bad Beats: Do Not Bet This Man
A weekly look at smart plays, oddball propositions and all your tales of gambling woe....

Your Noontime College Football Thread
It's college football time. Let's see what's on tap for the early games.......

Was This A Missed Field Goal?
Cleveland Browns defensive coordinator Rob Ryan is making a big, passive-aggressive stink about the 31-yard kick you see here, the Bengals' game-winner over the Browns on Sunday. Alleged game-winner....

What Michael Vick Needs Now Is More Media Exposure
Speaking of racially charged topics, Michael Vick is going to have a reality show on BET. (Sorry, a "docu-series.") Is this just a re-run of the one we've been watching on ESPN for last two-and-a-half years? [LATimes/700 Level]...

Will Black Players Refuse To Play For Rush Limbaugh's Rams?
From a purely political standpoint, letting Rush Limbaugh buy into your football team is already an iffy proposition, but there's a more practical football issue to consider as well. Will some top players refuse to work for him?...

Today In Thinly-Veiled Omens
The oldest male jaguar at the Jacksonville Zoo has been euthanized, after suffering since August. Panthers throughout Florida and the Carolinas are sleeping poorly tonight. [Times-Union]...

White Trash Rebels Fans Would Like To See This Man Dead Over White Trash Comments
The SEC is littered with pugnacious rivalries, and one Bama'-banged Zabka named Taylor Fortenberry created his usual trash-talk video before this week's Ole Miss clash. Unfortunately, now Ole Miss fans want to kill him. Dead. For real....

Hawkeye Goes From Fan To Fanatic To Psychotic
At first this reads like the further pussification of sports, where a fan gets arrested for heckling a player. But it quickly takes a turn into Annie Wilkes territory....

Alabama Father Pleased Daughter's Domestic Dispute Won't Interfere With Football Season
Alabama linebacker Courtney Upshaw and his girlfriend both agreed to dismiss charges filed against the other after a lover's spat this summer. No one is more excited about this than the girl's father who exited the courthouse shouting, "Roll Tide!"...

World Can At Last Make A Germane "Dirty Sanchez" Pun
QB Mark Sanchez was fined $5,000 for his cheap shot on the Saints' Jonathan Vilma, in which Sanchez launched himself at Vilma's knees during Darren Sharper's 99-yard interception return for a touchdown. Such poise! [Star-Ledger, Pro Football Talk]...

BREAKING: Mark Sanchez Makes New York Ladies Swoon
The Jets golden boy quarterback is pretty nifty with the football, but did you know that he is also considered to be physically attractive? You do now, thanks to this hard hitting investigative report, "Mark Sanchez: Hot or Not?"...

Tony Romo: Not A Complete Idiot
As someone who has his competence challenged on a regular basis, I sympathize with Tony Romo. Luckily, unlike Romo, I've been spared the indignity of having to issue a press release to confirm that I know how to count....

Wide Receiver Drama Over: Braylon Edwards Traded, Michael Crabtree Signs
Adam Schefter woke up early today and jumped on two stories that will disappoint fans of ridiculous melodrama. Now that the Braylon Edwards saga is over in Cleveland and Michael Crabtree has ended his holdout, what will we talk about?...

NFL Players' Softer Sides Are Just As Dumb
Disclosure: thanks to a friend in editorial, I'm often one of the anonymous guys in the "men tell you what they really want" articles at Cosmo. That's my excuse for knowing that this month's issue features some football players....

Did Tony Romo Forget How To Count To Four?
Watching the Dallas Cowboys run the same failed play two times in a row probably confused a lot of their fans, but it might have been their quarterback who was confused about how many downs he had left....

Horrible Person Wants To Buy Horrible Team
Professional blowhard Rush Limbaugh is aiming to become a part-owner of the St. Louis Rams. I guess the team won't be drafting any black quarterbacks from now on. (But at least they'll play pain-free!) [KMOX/RiverfrontTimes/MediaMatters/SportsBiz]...

This Is What You Call The Hebert Salute
Former Saints quarterback Bobby Hebert let the shit-kickin' hillbilly overtake him after the Saints bullied the ball away from Captain Poise Pants to score a touchdown and put the game away....