Football Page 1570 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

We'd Recommend Not Playing Blackjack With Joey Porter
When you put Joey Porter in the same room with a Cincinnati Bengal, in Las Vegas, no less, this is probably destined to happen...

Dodge Chargers Are Not Free, Gabe Watson
The Arizona Cardinals are loaded with nefarious characters these days. They've got womanizing quarterbacks, prostitute-soliciting assistant coaches, and now, a defensive lineman who sticks his old high school coach with his car payments....

Tank Johnson Needs The Squirrel Master
Tank Johnson, the troubled Chicago Bears defensive lineman who was recently sentenced to 120 days in prison, is having problems making new friends in his new home. He's in protective custody, which means he's not having any contact with other inmates. When he first came into booking, though, Tank wa...

He Might Want To Lay Off The Nickname In Jail
So, for all of those who were losing faith in the justice system, you might this morning find yourself with some faith: Bears defensive lineman Tank Johnson is going to serve some jail time for the probation violation that involved all the, you know, artillery. A judge in Chicago sentenced him to 12...

We'd Suggest The Scrambling Eggs, As Long As The Owner Wears Proper Handgear
We're just gonna lay this one out there: Michael Vick has a restaurant, and, sadly, they do not serve Mexican food....

We Repeat: Please Let The Moss Trade Happen
Check The NCAA Live Blog!...

Jerramy Stevens Is A Man On The Move
All told, we think if you're going to get busted for a DUI — with weed in your car — it's probably the best time to do it is not when you're trying to snatch a new free agent contract. But hey, Jerramy Stevens has always marched to the drum of his own beater;...

Terrell Owens Will Not Turn In His Playbook Until He's Done Coloring It
No wonder Terrell Owens complains so much about not getting the ball. It's those damn quarterbacks who read the entire playbook. Filling their heads with running plays, audibles and routes to other receivers. His edition doesn't have all that worthless junk. But it does have a comics section. From t...

The Patriots Are Dominating Free Agency
I'm growing increasingly uncomfortable with how the New England Patriots are spending money this off-season. The Patriots are a threat to win the Super Bowl when they aren't spending money. Adding Adalius Thomas, Wes Welker, Kyle Brady and now Donte Stallworth to the mix... it just makes me terribly...

Can Pacman Jones Please Pick Up His 7-10 Split In Peace?
With "wrong place, wrong time" becoming less of a clich and more of a way of life, Pacman Jones is in the news again. A knife-wielding man went after Pac in a bowling alley last night, threatening to beat him up and slice a few holes in him. Jeff Fisher is not a suspect....

Who Would YOU Trust To Get The Right Supplements In Your Body?
In life, I guess it's best to stick with what you know, which is how a guy like OJ Simpson ends up trying to sell books about how to kill people. Along those same lines, it makes all the sense in the world that Bill Romanowski, former linebacker and admitted steroid abuser, is launching a "supplemen...

The New Buzzsaw Regime Supports Local Business
Richie Anderson, former NFL running back and recently hired as wide receivers coach of the Arizona Cardinals, was finding it difficult to make friends in his new community....

USC Full Of White Power Bills
On the list of Poor Internets Decisions By High-Profile College Athletes, we have to say, starting up a Facebook group devoted to "White Power" as a "joke" has to be rather high up there....

It Is Not Wise To Welch On Mayoral Bets
So here's a bad idea: When you're the mayor of a team that's playing in the NFC Championship game, and you're on the line with the opposing city's radio flagship, it's not a good idea to make promises you can't keep....

Tom Brady Clearly Missed Some Health Classes In High School
So, it's beginning to seem like Tom Brady has some preternaturally talented swimmers....

Eli Manning, Wayne Palmer: Same Guy
We're big fans of the television show "24," mainly because we love torture and can't quite believe Kiefer Sutherland somehow became tough as he got older. (We also have a serious crush on Chloe.) We're not exactly sold on this season, however, mainly because we refuse to believe a simpering wimp lik...

Peyton's Handlers Say He Does This All The Time
Once the "PTI"s and "Around The Horn"s of the world finally got around to noticing Peyton Manning's Sweet 16 party photos yesterday, the folks in Manning's camp had to acknowledge them with the most boring press release paragraph we can remember....

The U Forgets What Makes It The U
You know, if they keep this kind of funny business up, the U is going to fall tragically behind in recruiting next year....

A <em>Real</em> Team Would Play A Tripleheader
More proof that our man Ron Zook — ARE YOU INTENSE ENOUGH FOR ZOOK???!!! — is a genius and is a force with which to be reckoned: He's smart enough to schedule games against teams who already have games scheduled that day....

Peyton Manning's Sweet 16 Party Cameo
So, less than a month after you've won the Super Bowl, you've got a bevy of entertainment options and endorsement opportunities. Or, you can just ignore both and sleep on a beach somewhere, maybe make out with balding country music stars your wife, just take it easy....