Football Page 1585 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It's Sleepy Football Night In America
We try to recap each weeknight game the morning after around here, because weekday games are rare and often are the talk of the "water cooler" around "the office" with one's "co-workers." Unfortunately, last night's Steelers-Browns tilt was, well, a completely shellacking that was over early and in ...
Well, It's Not That Big A Deal If You Miss This One
This, it's safe to say, is not one of those night when we're banging our head against the wall for not having the NFL Network. (We're far more concerned about missing the Rutgers bowl game.) The Steelers and the Browns, two teams long since removed from the playoff picture, go head to head tonight, ...
Bart Starr Totally Ditched This Chick Back In '66
Imagine, for a moment, that you're Bart Starr, a legendary quarterback, a hero to those who wear processed curds on their head, pretty much an all around prince of the planet. You're 72 years old; you just want to sign your merchandise, make sure your bladder's still working properly and sneak in an...
The Trojans Needed To VISUALIZE Their Success (Oh, And Tackle Better)
So why did Southern California lose to UCLA last week? Not because of a stout Bruins defense, or a somewhat green Trojans squad cracking under the pressure. Nope, they lost because coach Pete Carroll programmed his team to lose....
Big Ben Gets The Brady Treatment
The guy who made that my-lord-it's-everywhere Tom Brady tribute video has come out with a new one, devoted to SHOTY Tournament quarterfinalist Ben Roethlisberger. It's moderately amusing, but we mostly enjoy that it briefly features our famous Big Ben photos and ends with the line "Should have start...
Afterwards, They Attacked A Guy With Their Unfinished Screenplays
You know, we have to give credit where credit is due: We have never considered UCLA Bruins fans among the most passionate and violent in the land of collegiate sports, but, apparently, we were mistaken. After the Bruins' win over USC last Saturday, a group of Bruins fans ganged up and attacked a Tro...
Give A Shoutout To The Men Who Bring You The Dumb Bowls
In a valuable work of public service, the guys at Get Untracked have compiled a list of the official contacts for each of the 32 college football bowl games. They dig up all kinds of fascinating tidbits....
Saints' Wheezer Nailed For Inhaler Doping
The poor soul unfortunate enough to have been caught in the extreme closeup lens of a Getty Images photographer last week, seen here, is New Orleans Saints defensive tackle Hollis Thomas, who yesterday was suspended for four games by the NFL for violating its steroid policy....
Tom Brady Sorts Out The BCS Confusion
Well it's Wednesday, and surely by now Michigan fans are over the sting of not being voted into the BCS title game opposite Ohio State. We imagine that Rose Bowl Fever is gripping the state of Michigan. Right? Hello? (taps computer monitor)....
The Cheapest Of The Cheap Shots
The fine souls at The Wizard Of Odds have compiled a group of the most egregious cheap shots in college football this year, with clips, and is encouraging readers to vote....
You Say Seymour, We Say Pusey, Let's Call The Whole Thing Off
In July, we told you about Lucious Pusey, freshman linebacker for Eastern Illinois University. We also mentioned that he had petitioned to legally change his name to Lucious Seymour, an instinct we absolutely understand....
Jeff Garcia Cannot Be Destroyed By A Mortal Man
From our experience, when Jeff Garcia is making this motion, and he's about to chuck it long and downfield, something bad is about to happen. We mean, it's Jeff Garcia! The last few years, his main purpose has been to be the target of Terrell Owens' sublimated man-on-man urges....
Amazingly, This Is Actually An Important NFC Game
As insane as it might be to contemplate, the Philadelphia Eagles, a team that seemingly hasn't won in months, a team that is legitimately trying to figure out if they're going to start Jeff Garcia or A.J. Feeley, a team that its fans can't even muster up enough enthusiasm to hate properly ... this t...
Nothing More Enraging Than A Buzzsaw Loss
You know, we have to admit, if we were a fan of the St. Louis Rams, or, say, a former USC star who isn't even strong enough right now to make the active roster of the St. Louis Rams, after losing convincingly to the Buzzsaw yesterday, well, we might want to stab someone in the face too....
Join The Bowl Game Pants Party, If You DARE
For those of you still paying attention, we're still running our NFL Pants Party Pick 'Em league; with 2,512 entrants, a man/woman named "T. Clark," and his/her entry "Inst. of Victory Science" is comfortably in first place, with 132 correct games picked. (That's actually eighth in the entire ESPN.c...
Wear The Jersey Of Your Favorite Player's Venereal Disease!
You might remember the famous OutSports expose on the words that the NFL won't allow you to print on the back of their jerseys. Apparently, this guy, from the Atlanta game last weekend, was somehow able to iron on this tribute to Ron Mexico himself....
Punching Cops In The Chest? BAD IDEA
Can you believe it has only been a month since a Cincinnati Bengal was arrested? Seriously, it's almost as like they were winning and no one had noticed!...
Perhaps She Has Chosen The Wrong Collegiate Extracurricular Activity
The M Zone takes a moment away from screaming at the heavens and cursing Allah to bring us this video, from the USC-UCLA game Saturday — way to step up, Trojans, by the way — and the famous Unable To Figure Out When Is, In Fact, The Correct Time To Cheer cheerleader. She has a tendency to strike dur...
Blogdome: BCS Smackdown Edition
What the blogs are saying about the BCS matchups ......
BCS Mess Claims More Victims: Everyone
Who's unpopular in the Michigan area right now? Former Washington State coach Jim Walden, the one member of the Harris BCS poll who voted Florida No. 1 in the country and one of the reasons the Gators are playing Ohio State in the BCS "title" game rather than Michigan. Walden is hardly alone in his ...