Football Page 1606 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

David Akers, Kicker Badass
If you needed any more proof that Philadelphia Eagles kicker David Akers is ready to take on all comers, we present David Akers ... kickboxer! We suppose, if you're kicking for a living anyway, you might as well figure out how to kick, you know, humans....

In Case It Slipped Your Mind, Ohio State Still Hates Michigan
For the record, we're pretty sure that the Pat Forde-recommended Dead Schembechlers hate the University of Michigan more than any punk band ever hated anything, and that's saying something. So if you also hate the Wolverines, you won't want to miss the Hate Michigan Rally on Nov. 17 in Columbus, hea...

It's 3 1/2 In The Pokey For Clarett
Word just came in about an hour ago: Former Ohio State running back Maurice Clarett has pled guilty to two felonies and will spend at least the next 3 1/2 years in prison. Jury selection was about to begin in the case, but lawyers accepted the plea of 7 1/2 years, with the first parole opportunity p...

That's Not A Fun Way To Lose
Saturday was an outstanding day for college football — particularly if you went to Syracuse, grumble grumble — but it was not so pleasant for Oklahoma fans, who, as this video rather clearly shows, were screwed out of a big road victory against Oregon. It's funny, because one wouldn't think it would...

A Day At Paul Brown Stadium
So, we are sad to report that we did not make it to Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson's dramatic interpretation of the chicken dance at Cincinnati's Oktoberfest on Saturday afternoon; we figured by the time we actually made it downtown, we'd be too far away to see anything but the tip of Johnson's ...

NFL Roundup: Take Solace In Akers
Observations and tidbits from a day of football ...>...

NFL Week 2: Update #4
Denver 9, Kansas City 6. This wasn't football, this was a crime against football. I shouldn't even mention it here. Three hours of straight boredom. And since I don't want to talk about it, let me just mention this: I have three QBs on my fantasy roster: Chad Pennington, Rex Grossman, and Jake Plumm...

NFL Week 2: Update #3
Tennessee 0, San Diego 17. And it's not really as close as the score would indicate. Kerry Collins and Vince Young have booth seen time at quarterback, and honestly, the Titans might be better off just playing without a quarterback. Lure Eric Crouch out of retirement, and run the option....

NFL Week 2: Update #2
Detroit 7, Chicago 34. And welcome back to the Detroit Lions. All that Week One optimism looks a little misguided at this point. Not that they're destined to be as bad as the Raiders or anything, but they're still 0-2 and just got their asses beat by Rex Grossman (20-of-27 for 289 yards and 4 TDs)....

Michael Irvin, Koren Robinson, And Ricky Williams Have A Song For You
Click icon to play video ...

NFL Week 2: Update #1
Cleveland 3, Cincinnati 14. Chad Johnson caught a touchdown pass for the Bengals, and followed it up with... the chicken dance. The era of awesome touchdown celebrations may be officially over. When we're doing dances that are designed for white people to do at weddings, I think we're in trouble. I ...

NFL Week 2: Things You'll Want To See
Oakland @ Baltimore. This game should answer some questions on exactly how bad Oakland could be. I really believe that they've got the potential to be one of the all-time legendary disasters in sports history. A key to this, though, is keeping Aaron Brooks healthy. They can't reach the depths they'r...

Taking Down The Field Goal Posts: Irish Schadenfreude
• (11) Michigan 47, (2) Notre Dame 21. I don't think there's anything that the college football watching public enjoys more than seeing Notre Dame get beaten - nay, romped - in a big game. I didn't get to publish even a small fraction of the overjoyed comments that came as a result of Michigan's 4...

Hugh Johnson Project, Update 4
Louisville just went up 24-7 on Miami, Michigan looks to be pretty firmly in control of things, and I'm just going to leave you to enjoy those things... if you're the type that likes to see big-name programs get humiliated. Enjoy the big games tonight, too....

Hugh Johnson Project, Update 3
• That Brady Quinn is so good-looking that I'll bet even Pam Ward thinks he's hot. - drocksportsguy...

Hugh Johnson Project, Update 2
• Not actually watching any college football at the moment, as I just woke up, but the Pam Ward's short WikiPedia page entry reads "Pam Ward is probably a lesbian." - DriveInHard...

Hugh Johnson Project, Update 1
• "There was a sign during Gameday this morning - "Charlie Weis: The Devil Lovechild of Jabba the Hut @ Rosie O'Donnell." - Lingering Bursitis...

Nothing Says "Sloth" Like A Long College Football Saturday
As has been established, tomorrow is a day for much gluttony/sloth/greed/skinny ladies' head in the box: seven pretty outstanding college football games. And no, we're not referring to Syracuse-Illinois. We are actually offended that the game is on television....

Never, Ever Bet On The Texans
In the wake of last week's free-furniture-if-the-Bears-shut-out-the-Packers promotion in Chicago, the folks at Gallery Furniture, the huge Texas furniture place that even hosts a bowl game from time to time, has decided to push all its chips to the middle of the table, 10-gallon hat style....

Taking One ... "Yeoooowwww, Kelly Clarkson!" ... For the Team
What with the price of gas and all, there apparently isn't a lot to do over at the Basney Honda in South Bend, Ind. So co-workers told Jason Gordon that they would chip in and get him two tickets to the Notre Dame-Michigan game, and all Gordon had to do to earn them was get a full body wax. Irish fa...