Football Page 1658 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
You Can't Trust Cheerleaders. You CAN'T.
Proving once again that she has no idea how you succeed in this world, Panthers cheerleader Angela Keathley, the black-haired member of the duo, has released a statement to deny there was any sex at all. Despite statements from those who were waiting in line for them — and statements from everyone...
Welcome Back To L.A.
Uh, if you're a Vikings, Chargers or Saints fan today, we'd suggest not getting too attached to your team. Yesterday, NFL commissioner Paul Tagliabue announced that the league and the city of Los Angeles had reached an agreement to bring a team back to So-Cal. The Coliseum will be the host for thi...
We Apologize In Advance ... But MORE CHEERLEADERS!
We know we implied yesterday that we were just about done with this whole Carolina cheerleader thing, but, you see, we just ... can't ... tear ourselves ... away. We suspect you understand....
Vote T.O.!
The pictured advertisement is what's currently front and center on TerrellOwens.com, the official Web site of everybody's favorite apologizer....
Your Token "Sweep The Leg, Johnny" Reference
One of our favorite Doug Flutie stories was when then-Dolphins coach Jimmy Johnson, trying to motivate his team for an upcoming game against the Bills, destroyed a box of Flutie Flakes in front of his team. When Flutie heard about the incident, his face fell. "That cereal is to benefit autism rese...
Wrapping Up The Lesbian Cheerleaders Story
We've reached the saturation point, we think, on the Carolina Panthers cheerleader story, but, frankly, we don't care, and we suspect you don't either. Here's an update on what we've all got, to close this out. Smile wide:...
Happy Trails, Holmes
In very sad news, Kansas City Chiefs running back Priest Holmes is out for the season and, according to several sources, could end up retiring. (A Chiefs spokesperson denies the retirement rumors.)...
Rosenhaus Sets T.O.'s Career Ablaze
One pretty amazing press conference involving Terrell Owens this afternoon. Owens came out and made a seemingly sincere statement, apologizing to his fans, the Eagles, Andy Reid, Donovan McNabb, the owners, pretty much everybody but Jeff Garcia. We were watching it thinking, "Man, he actually see...
Manning's Cute Little Cheerleader Problem
As you might have noticed, sometimes we like to make fun of Peyton Manning's (heavily) rumored sexual orientation from time to time. But our degenerate gambler brother at Oddjack has a strange little scoop that implies Peyton likes to hang out with cheerleaders of his own. From former Indianapolis...
Don't Forget About The Sex Cruise!
While the rest of us sully our filthy little minds with stories of lesbian cheerleaders, The Mighty MJD is keeping his eyes on the prize of the whole Vikings sex boat story. (How quickly we forget ...)...
Panthers Cheerleader Story Remains Hot Hot
Well, we're on day two of the Carolina Panthers cheerleaders story, and, frankly, we're not seeing much letup in the demand for more news news news! And we're with you. Today's big scoop (and big "ups," as the kids say) goes to the fine lads at YAYSports! who have brand-new EXCLUSIVE! photos culle...
Problem Is, He'd Keep Missing The Ribbon With The Scissors
From famed (and much better at this whole business than we are) New York blogger TMFTML, in response to the news that former quarterback bust Heath Shuler is running for Congress, floats the glorious notion of a Ryan Leaf candidacy....
Sean Salisbury Loves To Teach The Ladies Tricks
In his ESPN chat today, "analyst" Sean Salisbury "announced" the launch of his official Web site. We've been scanning it, and we're sad to say there isn't a single "Battlebots" reference. However: Salisbury does post a bizarre press release thing about some "seminar" on teaching women about footb...
With Enough Weed, What's The Difference?
From the NFL Wives Yahoo Group, in response to the query (not from us, we swear) "Ladies please name any and every athlete whether NFL, NBA or NCAA that is Bi Sexual or just plain GAY!!!."...
An Interview With The "Lee Corso Is A Penis" Guy
Remember that guy who held up that "Lee Corso Is A Penis" sign behind the ESPN ranter a few weeks ago? Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer has an interview with the guy. Fittingly, the guy wouldn't give this last name because, of course, he wants to work for ESPN....
Meet The New Packers Running Back
The Packers might be down to to their fifth-string running back, but that's hardly a bad thing. In fact, new fantasy obsessive pickup Samkon Gado is one of our new favorite players, because we've come across MySpace profile, and, all told, we think the guy sounds kind of cool....
Is Peyton Ready For His Closeup?
Well, we've finally rid ourselves of that long-running subplot; the Colts have finally beat the Patriots, in a sadly dull Monday nighter. (Honestly, nobody shows less joy than Peyton Manning after a victory; it's like interviewing a hickish, slightly fey math teacher after he gives a test.) Indian...
Manning Vs. Brady, Monday Night Football. That'll Work.
Tonight's the game that's so huge that Sports Illustrated actually resisted the temptation to put Terrell Owens on the cover for it: Colts at Patriots, Manning vs. Brady, stats vs. results, dogs vs. cats, gay vs. straight, you name it....
That's All For T.O.
Making the unofficial officially official, Eagles coach Andy Reid announced a few minutes ago that Terrell Owens will not play for the Eagles again this season....
Smells Like Team Spirit In Carolina
As you would probably expect, we're getting all kinds of tips and info about the two Carolina Panthers cheerleaders who sis-boom-bahhed each other over the weekend, and we've even got some people on the inside whispering in our ear....