Football Page 996 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jerry Jones: Still Skeevily Groping Women?
It’s been awhile since we’ve had a chance to enjoy(?) some pictures of gross-ass Jerry Jones fondling women while desperately trying to work up a boner, but we can (apparently) do it again today thanks to some new pictures published by Terez Owens....

Ray McDonald Arrested Again, For Allegedly Violating Restraining Order
Former Chicago Bears and San Francisco 49ers defensive end Ray McDonald was arrested this evening by Santa Clara (Calif.) police for violating a restraining order. The restraining order was issued in connection with an incident that occurred two days ago, when McDonald was arrested on misdemeanor do...

The Texans Will Be On <i>Hard Knocks</i> And I'm Already Bored
According to multiple reports, the Texans will appear on this season’s edition of training-camp documentary Hard Knocks....


Colin Kaepernick Unwisely Compares Self To Houston Floods
Colin Kaepernick’s hashtag of choice is #7tormsComing, which is a horrible sentence to write. The 49ers QB decided to use it again today with the Houston flash floods as a news peg, along with a photo of some local devastation. The message wasn’t only insensitive to the alphabet....

Gronk Visits Charleston, Stuffs Face Into Girl's Chest
Beer golem Rob Gronkowski went to Charleston, S.C. for Memorial Day weekend, and from the looks of it, the summer of Gronk is making up for all that time spent on deflated balls....

Jim "Learn The Fucking Rules" Schwartz To Work With NFL Officiating
Who wants Jim Schwartz? The NFL officiating department, apparently....

Seahawks Punter Competes On A<i>merican Ninja Warrior</i>, Loses
For the record, I’m pretty sure every member of the Deadspin staff would fail on the first American Ninja Warrior obstacle. None of us are professional athletes, either, so we’re not sure whether to be impressed or underwhelmed by Seahawks punter Jon Ryan’s very short appearance on last night’s epis...

Report: Buffalo, Washington, And Houston Are Potential <i>Hard Knocks</i> Teams
Thanks to new rules instituted after HBO and the NFL had difficulty finding a team to appear on Hard Knocks, the league can now force teams to take part if they meet certain criteria. Nine teams fit the bill: The Browns, Redskins, Giants, Buccaneers, Vikings, Texans, Rams, Titans, and Jaguars. Most ...

Aaron Hernandez Got A New Neck Tattoo In Prison
Aaron Hernandez was in court again today, entering a not-guilty plea to witness intimidation charges stemming from an incident when he allegedly shot his friend in the face for talking about those other guys he allegedly shot. Anyway, Aaron Hernandez got himself a new tattoo in prison....


Jets Look At QB Depth Chart, Sigh Deeply, Name Geno Smith Starter
The Jets have made a lot of impressive decisions this offseason, and that’s not the setup for a joke. Darrelle Revis came back, the already-fearsome defensive line improved with draft pick Leonard Williams, and they snagged Brandon Marshall for a fifth-round pick. There’s a lot of talent everywhere—...

Will New Extra-Point Rules Cause More Teams To Go For Two?
So, it’s official. NFL extra points won’t be nearly as much of a gimme after the owners voted 30-2 (with Oakland and Washington voting no) to move the PAT back to the 15-yard line. But what will actually change?...

Report: Titans Gave Scalper Tickets, Wrote Them Off As Military Donation
NFL sellout streaks are practically meaningless except to show fans’ interest when lobbying for a stadium financing, and to avoid blackouts. According to a report from NewsChannel 5 in Nashville, the Titans had a deal with a ticket broker to keep their streak alive and stay on TV....

Robert Kraft Will Not Appeal The Patriots' Penalties
Citing a desire to end this now, Patriots owner Bob Kraft announced that he will “reluctantly” accept the NFL’s penalties for Ballghazi: New England will pay its $1 million fine and lose two draft picks. ...

The Dispute Between Robert Kraft And Roger Goodell Just Got Sexy
As the Patriots and NFL clandestinely negotiate a mutual agreement to avoid legal war, Adam Schefter hints that owner Robert Kraft and commissioner Roger Goodell are now back on good terms. Schefter comes to this conclusion because a source told him that Kraft and Goodell hung out on a couch and hug...

Report: The NFL Asked The Patriots To Make Themselves Look Guilty
And the Patriots complied! Ballghazi by this point is a stacked farce, where every new outrageous development only serves to obscure why we were supposed to be outraged in the first place. But one very paradoxical question still looms large: If the Patriots, as they maintain, shouldn’t be punished b...