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Great Moments In Sports Poop History: Awful Announcing

And now for the second entry in greatest sports blogging series of all time. This sports poop story comes to us from Brian Powell at Awful Announcing, who drops this steaming deuce of a tale on us. “Back in the wild and crazy late 90s, I was a D-1 NCAA athlete at a small institution just north of Baltimore (Towson State). The Sport was the glamorous Cross Country, and the race in question was the first in my college running career. Now in High School, XC races are 5Ks, but in college that total is doubled to a 10K which is just over six miles. Thinking my body wasn't ready for the transition, I decided to overload on carbs the night before with about seven plates of spaghetti at the University Dining Hall, and I was feeling it the next day.....especially at the five-mile mark of the race.“Luckily there wasn't anyone around, and I was deep in MD/PA woods at the time, but I felt a rumbling in the stomach that could not be ignored. You're taught to never stop running in Cross Country (I once saw a dude get hit by a deer and didn't even turn around), so I tried to run through the discomfort. After about 45 seconds of waddling, I just decided to let go and a beautiful Italian, carb filled log fell out of my tiny running shorts and onto the path. Feeling much lighter, I went on to finish that last mile in a full sprint and to this day it was one of my best 10K times ever. “Sure, Britain's Paula Radcliffe can stop and pee during a marathon and still win. But did she leave a beautiful log right in the middle of the street for her competitors to deal with? I submit that she did not!” Ah, but did it leave a healthy skid mark on the way out? Had to, right? No pair of Umbros gets away unscathed from a runner’s loaf.


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