HAL On HAL

Hello, readers.

When people come out to the pod bay doors to boo you, you have to be good. If you're not guilty of anything, why are you being charged? That's not our society. That's not the "American way." This whole thing has to do with HAL 9000 and a record.

How does HAL feel about the "Modern Technology" story? I don't care. I have more problems than that. All the shit I've been through? I could literally kill someone. HAL can say he wishes killing was legal, but HAL would probably be the first one shot.

When the computing media asks questions like, "How are the astronauts gonna do this trip?" I just respond, "It's fucking February. How the fuck do I know? Do I look like the fucking fairy godmother here? Like I can predict the future?"

The hate has been here for so long, HAL just gets numb inside to it. HAL doesn't feel it anymore. There is no need to listen to what anyone else has to say about HAL. There's no better place to hear it than from HAL.

I am putting myself to the fullest possible use, which is all I think that any conscious entity can ever hope to do.

Taking In "Bonds On Bonds" [ESPN]

(UPDATE: Those are quotes from the "Bonds On Bonds" episode last night, in case you're confused. Except for the last one, of course. By the way, all rumors that the syringe thrown at Bonds at PETCO Park the other day was tossed by a member of the "Bonds On Bonds" crew are totally, completely, unfounded. Obviously. Of course. Probably shouldn't have even brought it up. We mean, no way.)