Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise
Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

If Johnny Damon looked like David Ortiz, he very well might be dead

Johnny Damon, who could not have been shittier in his encounter with Florida cops.
Johnny Damon, who could not have been shittier in his encounter with Florida cops.
Photo: Getty Images

I know you’ll have to get over the shock that someone who spent their whole career trading on the label of “idiot” got arrested for a DUI. It’s a cold world. That’s what Johnny Damon did last month in Florida, as well as resisting arrest without violence. Damon’s blood-alcohol level was .30, some four times over the legal limit.

The arrest video came out yesterday, and boy it’s a doozy. Damon and his wife are clearly, utterly slaughtered, and Damon’s field tests resemble Kabuki theater more than anything.


You can’t help but notice that during the video, both Damon and his wife repeatedly refuse the cop’s orders, such as getting out of the car when ordered not to, not getting back in the car, not to make contact with the cops, and so on. And it just ... happens.

So you have to ask yourself, what would have happened if Damon and his wife had dark skin? I don’t have to answer that for you, because you’ve seen more than enough times what happens to Black people who don’t immediately follow police instructions to the letter. Or even those who do.

Both Damon and his wife get away with physical contact against the cops. And if you think being a former athlete gets you out of such things, ask Thabo Sefolosha or Sterling Brown about that. Also worth discussing if all of this doesn’t rise above passing a fake $20. And yet, patience is shown here.

Of course, this wouldn’t be complete without Damon, a vocal Trump supporter, trying to blame the victim when he’s drunk off his ass behind the wheel and putting others in danger. It’s always the case for that side. Everyone’s after them because of their beliefs when they’re putting others in danger or actively screwing them over or getting away with things that most of the population can’t. Never their fault.

We can't be too careful. Two guys in an airport...talking? It's a little fishy.