Sports News Without Access, Favor, Or Discretion

One wonders if Dungeons & Dragons creator Gary Gygax was a big sports guy — we're gonna assume "no" until his estate can prove otherwise — but even he would admit there's a hell of a lot of actual worthwhile games today. The Rockets try to continue their winning streak against the Lakers. The SEC championship somehow became Georgia vs. Arkansas. And a car race with no inclement weather! That's new. And with all of that, he'd probably rather play the old school Stronghold, which is basically Sim-City with saving throws.

12 noon — NHL: Philadelphia Flyers at Pittsburgh Penguins. Way to rub it into the entire species that being able to fly is something mutually exclusive from being a penguin. [NBC]


1:00 p.m. — NBA: New Orleans Hornets at Detroit Pistons. Chris Paul? I love his fishsticks! [ABC]

1:00 p.m. — NCAA basketball: ACC Championship, Clemson vs. North Carolina. Winner actually does play the Charlotte Bobcats. [ESPN]

1:00 p.m. — NCAA basketball: SEC Championship, Georgia vs. Arkansas. Bubble teams were last seen trying to disable the Bulldogs' alarm clocks. [CBS] (It's 3:30 on ESPN2 now.)

1:00 p.m. — NCAA basketball: Southland Championship, UT-Arlington vs. Northwestern State. The Demons, playing on the Sabbath? Well, I never. [ESPN2]


1:30 p.m. — NASCAR: Food City 500, Bristol, Tennessee. Darrell Waltrip just drew an exquisite Venn diagram outlying the relationship between rubbin' and racin'. [FOX]

2:30 p.m. — Golf: Arnold Palmer Invitational, final round. Tiger Woods and Sean O'Hair in a chip-off. Who ya got? [NBC]


3:00 p.m. — NCAA basketball: Big 12 Championship, Kansas vs. Texas. There's so much on the line here. Winner gets taken down perhaps a full notch on their tournament seeding. Duke & Duke have held more expensive bets. [ESPN]

3:30 p.m. — NBA: LA Lakers at Houston Rockets. The world needs the dulcet passing of Rafer Alston now more than ever. [ABC]


3:30 p.m. — NCAA basketball: Big Ten Championship, Illinois vs. Wisconsin. As is tradition, the Big Ten title game will be played without a shot clock. [CBS]

4:00 p.m. — MLB Spring Training: LA Angels at Chicago Cubs. Strangely, nobody wants to sign Felix Pie's cast. [WGN]

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