Watching Vikings quarterback Kirk Cousins try to do anything remotely coordinated may be worse than binge-watching a Tyler Perry original series on BET. So you should understand why I rarely tune in to Vikings games or anything else the H&R Block accountant disguised as an NFL QB may decide to do.
But today, Cousins decided to embarrass himself on the field even worse than normal by trying to hit the “Griddy” dance. I simply couldn’t ignore this opportunity to flame this man.
He tried the move after scoring on a quarterback sneak late in the Vikings’ final game of the season against the Lions. Needless to say, he failed at it. Cousins has about as much rhythm as a beer-gutted father of 5 with two torn knees. Cousins has as much flavor as a communion cracker without Welch’s grape juice. Obviously, his attempt at dancing looked more abysmal than a Trump toupee.
For those who aren’t familiar, the “Griddy” is a new dance craze that has gained popularity over the last year or so. Cousins’ rookie teammate and record-breaking wide receiver Justin Jefferson made it popular amongst sports fans at LSU. It has since become a staple of Jefferson’s pro touchdown celebrations. Many others have adopted the dance as their own celebration move. But even if you look at the slowed-down replay of Cousins hitting the “Griddy,” you can not defend this man. The Vikings’ social media team turned the footage into a GIF that makes Cousins look like a baby ostrich just learning how to walk.
In all honesty, I would like to thank Cousins for giving Vikings fans a laugh today in the final game of the season. I know he’s been making many of them cry since September cause of his play so this was a nice way to wrap everything up. The moral of the story is, just do better Kirk, at everything.