More rules changes today, including protecting quarterbacks while also creating more opportunities for them to get hurt and finding a way to have even more riding on the outcome of playoff games.

First, the new "Brady Rule." The loss of Tom Brady due to a knee injury last fall not only bankrupted the NFL, it destroyed Wall Street and the Republican party, and worse, it caused America to lose faith in itself. In order to insure that never happens again, evil defensive lineman who have been chopped block to the ground will no longer be allowed to lunge at a quarterback's legs, a technique sometimes referred to as "tackling." Quarterbacks are our most precious natural resource.

In other news, Roger Goodell is seriously contemplating adding two more games to the regular season, providing two extra hours of opportunities each year for the aforementioned quarterbacks to get their lights knocked out. Does he realize that if this change had already been in place in 2008, we would have had to suffer through 18 or 19 weeks of Brady-less football, instead of the normal 17? I wouldn't even wish that kind of pain of France.

There's also a new expansion of the replay review process that will protect Ed Hoculi from angry mobs.


And just for the hell of it, the league will change the rules of the draft so that playoff results, rather than regular season record, will determine the draft order the following year. (The Super Bowl champion will pick last, etc.) Fortunately, not a single good player has ever been picked in the latter third of the first round, so this rule will have absolutely no effect on anything.

Brady rule: Steps taken to protect QBs' knees - The Boston Globe [Boston Globe]
NFL meetings wrap; Goodell says study of expanded season will continue [USA Today]
""Hochuli" rule and draft order change adopted" [Chargers Blog]
Extended Schedule Proposition Shows NFL's Hypocrisy [Bleacher Report]
NFL owners pass change on playoff teams draft order [ESPN]