ESPN’s Mina Kimes has written a great profile of Michael and Martellus Bennett, the two brothers who consistently provide the best soundbites in the NFL. The whole story is an enjoyable read, but one highlight is the brothers issuing raw takes on other figures around the league.
How do the brothers feel about Jay Cutler?
“Worst quarterback in the NFL,” [Michael] says.
“I’d be open and he’d throw into double coverage,” says Martellus, who spent the past three seasons as Cutler’s teammate in Chicago.
How about Roger Goodell?
Michael: “A—hole. Nah, I’m just joking — you can’t say that. Overpaid.”
Michael: “The greatest quarterback in the NFL.”
Martellus: “Vicious. Competitive.”
Michael: “A real Joe Montana.”
Do Eli Manning next!
Martellus: “Eli? He’s cool. He’s like a normal white guy you see at the park trying to teach his kids how to play soccer and you know he can’t really play soccer himself.”
But the brothers saved their truest burns for J.J. Watt:
Michael: “Dominant player.”
Martellus: “Corny. Half of the NFL is corny, though.”
Michael: “People love J.J. Watt, but they don’t really like J.J. Watt, know what I’m saying?”
The rest of Kimes’s profile—which features Martellus saying that “NFL” stands for “Niggers For Lease” while discussing the league’s lack of guaranteed contracts—is well worth your time and you should read it right away.