Allow us to be the next in the long line of people lamenting the sorry state of the Indianapolis 500. The race has always been the only automobile-related event โ€” save for any demolition derby โ€” we've ever cared much about, and not just because it took place an hour-and-a-half from our house.

Now, of course, the Indy 500 is an IRL curiosity while NASCAR runs everything else on the planet, including matters of perfume, heatable meals and romance novels. The only reason anyone pays attention to the Indianapolis 500 anymore? The name, the weekend and the fact that, one of these days, an attractive woman is going to win it. (Side note: We continue to be amused by IRL drivers who complain that women do well in their sport because they're smaller and can therefore go faster. Alas: We've finally found a physical athletic advantage women might have over men, and men are all bitching about it. Figures.)

But yeah, it's Memorial Day Weekend, and we have so many memories of falling asleep on the porch while the Indianapolis 500 buzzed pleasantly behind us that we had to mention it.

What Happened To You, Indianapolis 500? [Rumors And Rants]
Hugo Chavez On Indy 500 [Lion In Oil]
Carol Brady As You Never Knew Her [Randball]