NFL commissioner Roger Goodell held a press conference in Chicago today to announce the 2016 NFL Draft’s return to the city, and while he was taking questions, the Boston Globe’s Ben Volin took the chance to ask why the league didn’t correct Chris Mortensen’s “11 of 12 footballs” report when Ted Wells’s investigation proved it to be inaccurate. At this point, Roger Goodell’s processor overheated and he emitted random words until everyone stopped looking at him.

Read the transcript and try to figure out what the hell this sunburnt chicken breast was saying:


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