a Page 8220 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Tom Verducci Cleans Up His Own Mess
This week's Sports Ilustrated cover story — apparently SI.com has a magazine? — is about "the incredible shrinking slugger." The writer of this story is, of course, Tom Verducci, whose front page interview with Ken Caminiti three years ago got this whole ball rolling. Wouldn't it be hysterical if so...
Yes! Barry's Back!
Barry Bonds' journal has returned! After a torturous 11 days of waiting, we have been blessed with the presence of Our Precious once again. Because he has been hooked up to IVs and heard dire warnings of possible leg amputations, Barry's journal is awful sobering this week. Just a bunch of stuff ...
Rob Neyer, International Man Of Mystery
Everybody's favorite mainstream stat dweeb Rob Neyer just started off his ESPN chat with this meaty missive:...
Hey Fans, Come Pee In A Cup!
In the tradition of wacky minor league promotions everywhere, the Sioux Falls Canaries held a BALCO Be Gone promotion last night. All fans who arrived were given a free specimen cup and were tested for steroids throughout the game. (No word on how many fans ended up juiced.) They also had other g...
Big Cocks On ESPN (Sorry)
We might make fun of ESPN.com sometimes — a little, maybe — but they win big points for this article about cockfighting. It also ends with this classic line: "If I ever live in Guam, all bets are off."...
Today in MLB Blogs
Here at MLB Blogs, we care about you, the blogger. Except for those of you in the greater Chicago area, whom we would prefer to mock (see the photo now up at the top of our site). You all remember Steve Bartman. Welcome back, Steve. Um, that is you there in the middle, right? Moises Alou is nowh...
We're Sorry, But For Wearing Arroyo's Haircut To School, He Deserves Execution, Not Suspension
Student Suspended For Wearing Arroyo Haircut To School [Boston Herald]...
Lousy Closer Spurs T-Shirt Sales
Danny Graves, the firestarter who was designated for assignment by the Reds yesterday, continues to inspire considerable consternation from his supporters and his detractors. Strangely, his biggest boosters seem to be the teammates whose lives he has made miserable all season; Cincy social climbe...
More Cartoon Idiocy at ESPN
"Episode Two" of "Off-Mikes" — the visual interpretation of Mike Greenberg's and Mike Golic's morning show — has premiered on ESPN.com. As usual, it's just a bunch of ADD animation with a couple of buffoon figures doing slapstick. A legitimate question: Who in the world likes this crap? We don't ...
Baseball Prospectus Nerds Make Our Head Explode
We love the Baseball Prospectus guys. They're fun, they're smart, they're scrappy and they're usually right. But sometimes they exhaust us. In a story about the offensive explosion of the last decade (subscription required), they produce the above graph....
Mike Piazza Goes (Log Cabin?) Republican
That photo to the contrary, we now have definitive evidence that Mike Piazza is not, in fact, gay: He loves Rush Limbaugh. Upon spotting Limbaugh at Turner Field yesterday, Piazza — whose brother is head of the Montgomery County, Pa. Republican Party — stepped away from pregame warmups to shake L...
David Letterman: Nascar Dad
Like any right-minded American male between the ages of 24 and 54, we grew up loving David Letterman. And native Indianaian Letterman grew up loving the Indianapolis 500, culminating in his co-ownership of the Bobby Rahul Racing Team, which employs hot commodity Danica Patrick in this weekend's r...
The Notorious Punter
Todd Sauerbrun has always made a little too much news for a punter. It started when the Bears made him a second-round draft pick, which was a totally good idea, really. Then he was accused of taking steroids prescribed by Panthers team doctors. Then he was involved in some hot punter-on-punter tr...
Tyrone Calico: Parking Novice
Any teenage boy could tell you the importance of parking. When your parents won't leave the house and you can't afford a hotel, the only place you can make out with girls is in your car. There are some key rules, though:...
Spurs Fans Can't Even Rap Right
It seems only fitting that the San Antonio Spurs — who always seem like the least NBA-like team in the NBA, which is probably why they're always winning — would have fans who are overly earnest, kinda dopey and completely lacking any funk whatsoever. Witness this rap song/video called "To The Ban...
Page 3 Brain Cell Destroyer Of The Day
Page 3 continues its slow, underfunded, rotting flop toward death they have to be averaging like three stories a week with an interview with Jon Bon Jovi. The dramatically maned one talks about ownership of AFL's Philadelphia Soul (his co-owner is Ron Jaworski!), his gripping performance in NBC's...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while dangling from a tree in your parachute ... Pistons go up 1-0 on Heat. As it turns out, Shaq still has some parts on back order.Anastasia Myskina ousted in French Open. The good news: You've never liked women's tennis. Danica Patrick on Letterman: Female Indy qualifier has cab c...
Boobs. Is There Anything Else Newsworthy?
You didn't think we'd ignore this all day, did you? The New York Post features a sports column today from the only person who knows less about the NBA than Peter Vescey: Anna Benson! The wife of overpaid Mets righthander Kris Benson penned the first of what will hopefully be millions of NY Post d...
Bill Simmons Changes Format For 5,234th Time
You know what we admire about Bill Simmons? His rock-solid consistency. Once again, Bill is explaining to us again why his site updates with the regularity of a malfunctioning strobe light. Supposedly — and this was a little confusing — Bill's going to post short items on More Cowbell (exactly th...
To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch Tonight Instead Of Chuckling At Soldiers Glaring At Nick Lachey: Game 1: Pistons at Heat: Little men make Shaq mad! Shaq crush little men! White Sox at Angels: The game will be played somewhere in the Los Angeles area. We're not allowed to say exactly where. Pirates at Cardinals: If Bo...