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What Could Be The Greatest Sports Story Ever
The man you see in this picture is Kevin Rogers. A football lifer, he is most famous for being Donovan McNabb's quarterback coach at Syracuse. He and his wife Betty are the parents of three. Earlier today, Rogers was hired by new coach Brad Childress to become the quarterbacks coach for the Minnes...

Advertising Whoredom, Commence!
We have advertisers on this site — yeah, we're as surprised as you — so we encourage you to buy their products, along with cheese and assorted meats. If you want to advertise, this handy link will tell you how....

Vroom-Vroom-VROOM!
Well, once again a religious group is threatening our constitutional right to admire a different NBA cheerleader in a bathing suit every month. The American Decency Organization is hopping mad at the Detroit Pistons for a recent team calendar which features members of the Pistons dance team in sk...

Say It Ain't So, Chad
So you know, Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson — forever known as Our Hero around here — did not get in a fight with his coach Marvin Lewis at halftime of Sunday's loss to the Steelers. Who said he did, you ask?...

Blogdom's Best: Hating The Avalanche
Imagine the most hateful sports fans you can think of, stuck indoors because of the frigid weather, allowing their fury to boil. Now give them large sticks. That's your typical NHL fan, just looking for a reason to hate the opposing team. Throw in that whole Canada-USA rivalry thing, and you've go...

Up Your Butt, Jobu
Not to get all Bill Simmons on you here — if just because we consider you less readers than active participants — but, hey, this is Deadspin Nation. Robert Taylor sends us these pictures of him and his friends from last Halloween, all dressed up as the guys from Major League....

How To Motivate Your Goalie
We've all thought it, particularly when watching games involving the Devil Rays, the Knicks or the Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals: We'd have to be able to do better than these idiots, right? During a Montreal Canadiens practice yesterday, one idiot acted on just that....

Excuse Our Dust
We're having some email server issues over here, so if you've been sending your tips to [email protected] and you haven't heard back from us, it's very possible that it didn't get here. We're sorry; we're working on it....

Mark Madsen's "Text Messages With The Stars"
Someone just directed us to Mark Madsen's blog — we honestly had no idea he had a blog; a star of such caliber, too! — and pointed out this particularly amusing entry about a cellphone text message he sent to Robert Horry last year, after Horry's huge 3-pointer for the Spurs in the NBA Finals:...

Elsewhere...
• Morris Peterson gets ejected from the Raptors/Nets game for slapping Vince Carter in the face. I didn't see it, so I can't comment, but I can't think of too many reasons to not slap Vince Carter. Sorry. I'm not a Vince Carter fan....

Week In Deadspin: We Never Once Said "Vin-SANITY." So You Know.
• Hey, there was a moderately enjoyable college football game this week. • Clinton Portis is the man, and, in case you were wondering, his mom rules too. • Support your local athletes, always, particularly if you're Stuart Scott. • Ichiro could be a killer, you know. • So you know, this guy is not...

Picking Up Where Chad Left Off
Since Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson has been so unfairly muffled all week, taking about 93 percent of the fun out of that Steelers-Bengals game, it has been up to fans to pick up his slack. One fan has come up with a great scenario....

Man Hugs For Sponsors
Our advertisers are our friends, and we give them big manly two-pats-on-back hugs, even if we can't afford any of their products and they occasionally make our site load slowly on Explorer. Here's this week's rundown of sponsors, and here's how you can become one....

Playoff Pants Party: Jaguars Vs. Patriots
This is the late game tomorrow night, which means, if you plan your day correctly, you should be properly hammered enough by halftime to confuse that dude in the corner with some ex-girlfriend who did you wrong. (Or, for female and non-traditional male readers, uh ... OK, we're not sure what the ...

New Vikings Coach Sporting Rare Mustache/Baldness Combo
Today, the Minnesota Vikings will announce that Eagles offensive coordinator Brad Childress will be their new coach, or, if you can't resist making the same joke everybody else is making this morning, captain of their ship. Childress has been with the Eagles for seven years, and, having seen Requi...

The Tragic Muzzling Of Chad Johnson
Well, it's the week before the Cincinnati Bengals' first playoff game in 15 years, and they're hosting it, against the hated division rival Pittsburgh Steelers. Man, oh, man, wide receiver Chad Johnson must be going crazy, right? What's he gonna do? Score a touchdown and smelt some ore? Strap on B...

Laura Quinn Gives Us A Fiesta Of Pain
Thoughts while watching about three hundred shots of Brady Quinn's sister, Laura, during the Fiesta Bowl last night: 1. We kind of miss that TV show, Xena, Warrior Princess. 2. We thought A.J. Hawk was some sort of famous skateboarder. Apparently we're confused. 3. Brent Musberger is still al...

Week In Deadspin: Closing Out '05
• Anna Benson will gun your ass down. • Jeff Reardon's medicine gets him in trouble, and not just with the international closer crime syndicates. • The Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals says goodbye to Sun Devil Stadium and its treasure trove of memories. • Darren Prince gave us a very nice ho...

Must Acknowledge Advertisers ... Must Acknowledge Advertisers ...
We thank our advertisers for their "support" and hope they don't mind that we're too poor to buy their products. If you want to be a part of this little parade of paddy-cake, go here, we're told....

Southeast Jerome In Heaven With Friends
OK, so as we showed you yesterday, Clinton Portis brought along some pals for his press conference yesterday. The conceit was that Southeast Jerome — who had been previously considered "lost" — had died and made it to heaven with all his friends. They included:...