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The Lactating Rafael Palmeiro
Well, now it appears that the "secret source" for Rafael Palmeiro's steroid wasn't a "source" or, for that matter, a "steroid." (But Palmeiro's name was, in fact, spelled correctly.) It turns out that Palmeiro told Congress that Orioles shortstop Miguel Tejada gave Palmeiro a B-12 Vitamin, which i...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while building a giant peanut out of thousands of regular peanuts ... • Monarchs win WNBA title! Whoa, calm down people of Sacramento! (Sound of crickets). • MLB: Ladies and gentlemen, your division-leading San Diego Padres. • MLB: Yankees beat Orioles, remain a half-game back in que...
Donovan McNabb, White Quarterback
We're not Professional Sports Columnists, but we'd have to say, just to keep our noses clean, the last thing we'd mention when discussing Eagles QB Donovan McNabb would be race. We'd mention his hairline, his goatee, even his ridiculous commercials, but race? That's OK, thanks, we'll be over here ...
The Greatest Team Name Of All Time
Sad day in the world of badminton: The New Zealand national badminton team has changed its name. What was it, you ask? Why, the New Zealand Black Cocks, of course....
Blogdome: San Diego Padres Edition
• What team scares the Cardinals the most? Would you believe the Padres? [Viva El Birdos] • Padres blogger: Don't hate us, American League! [Gas Lamp Ball] • Redskins fans might be a little too excited about that win last night. [Mr. Irrelevant] • Alabama school president in serious danger of damagi...
Jose Canseco, Professional Wrestler (Of Course)
We're not even going to pretend to be surprised here: Jose Canseco is rumored to making an appearance at Wrestlemania this spring. Perhaps it is telling that the people who are most concerned about this development are not baseball fans, but wrestling fans. Seems like the WWE — remember, that's wh...
NFL Roundup: Daunte's Blues
• If you somehow were able to make an emotionless, painless robot clone of Bea Arthur, and you pounded that clone in the face with a polo mallet for 25 minutes, then slammed that head in a car door 15 times, then severed the head with an exceptionally long and sharp toenail, then put the head in a...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while in the tub reenacting the battle of the Monitor and the Merrimack ... • MLB: Bonds hits 705th homer, is ordered to stitch actual asterisk to his uniform. • NFL: Brady's late-night carousing catches up to him in Patriots' loss to Panthers. • PGA: Some guy named Jason Gore wins s...
Week In Deadspin: We All Wear Masks
• Ed Hochuli ... JACKED UP! • Baseball players need motivational posters too. • John Marvel did not shoot pepper spray on you in a parking lot, so stop asking. • Tom Brady tried to get it on with an Olsen twin. That's awesome. • We repeat: Bill Simmons got his first boner from Cheryl Ladd. We just...
Leftovers: Take This Job And Shove It
• There is nothing more dangerous than an angry man in compression shorts: Lance Armstrong re-retires. [Instant Punditry] • Kim Clijsters' coach quits, perhaps in a huff, we're not sure. [tennisace] • Fantasy Prison Camp: Former Braves pitcher sent to the Gray Bar Hotel. [Atlanta Journal-Constitutio...
Welcome To Phoenix. We Hate The Home Team Here
Baseball blogs come in a few basic varieties. You have the committed fan (Bleeding Pinstripes), the starry-eyed kid (Look Who I Just Interviewed!) and those who have given up entirely and abandoned all perspective and self-respect (I Am Begging the Cardinals to Win the World Series). But rarely d...
Groupies Cause Battery Feud
Some great fun from the is-it-fictional-or-not-who-cares? groupie blind item On the DL this morning. Here's today's highlight:...
Blogdome: Ripping Favre
• So, hey, now that we think about it ... Brett Favre was kind of a dick to Javon Walker. [Sports Frog] • Hot new hockey site launching later today, by tapped-in anonymous blogger. Hey, it's a growth industry; hockey can't get any less popular. [HockeyBuzz] • Ryan Howard is the Dontrelle Willis of h...
Calling Mom For Domestic Backup
Some more updates on the domestic abuse allegations against notoriously angry Dodgers outfielder Milton Bradley. The Daily Breeze reviewed the 911 calls that started the whole allegations, and apparently, it was in fact Bradley who made the calls in order to calm down his "crazy" wife....
Tom Brady Loves Him Some Olsen Twin
Our big sister — and by "big sister," we mean "woman who wears shoulder pads" — reported yesterday that Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, in New York City for something called "Fashion Week," was sucking face with a bunch of women who did not star in I, Robot. Quoth a tipster:...
About Last Night ...
You awake in a large metal container, wearing a bear costume, with a tranquilizer dart stuck in your ass ... • MLB: Andruw Jones belts 50th homer, but you guessed it, Braves still lose. • WNBA Finals: Sacramento Monarchs win Game 1 of ... oh forget it, you're not even reading this. • MLB: That big f...
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as your children file for emancipation ... • MLB: Yankees at Devil Rays. Yanks try to win a series, finally, over last-place Tampa Bay. • WNBA Finals: Sacramento Monarchs vs. Connecticut Sun. Admit it, you're pumped. • MLB: Brewers at Diamondbacks. Milwaukee (72-72, NL Central) 20 game...
Leftovers: P.S., I Love You
• OSU tight end Ryan Hamby receives hate mail, drops it. [Around the Oval] • Rams exec leaves threatening phone message on columnist's voice mail. We love stories like that. [STL Today • Bill Simmons finally acknowledges that he works for the same company as Mario Lopez. [Sports Guy's World] • The D...
Blogdome: Stay Angry, San Diego
• Has a first place team ever been more unhappy and less fun to watch then the San Diego Padres? [Gas Lamp Ball] • A rare black umpire died. Did anyone notice? [BlackAthlete] • It might comes as a surprise to people outside of New York — or even, we'll admit, us — but Mark Messier wasn't nearly as p...
Bengals' Johnson Keeps Swooning Over Oprah
Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson is known for being brash, loud and Keyshawn Johnson's cousin. But we prefer knowing him for something so cute it makes us want to dance: He's in love with Oprah Winfrey. No, really. Last month, Johnson blessed us with the immortal quote: "It might soun...