ap Page 1464 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Cocaine, Bunny Rape And Lyndon LaRouche: A Children's Treasury Of Tall Tales From Pro Wrestling
Here's your reading material for tonight: "The Urban Legends of Professional Wrestling!" — all 460 of them. If you thought pro wrestling was a wholesome endeavor whose practitioners did not enjoy stuffing the Medellín Cartel up their nostrils, think again....

Florida Gators' Go-To Lawyer Has Some Issues Of His Own
The Orlando Sentinel, still tub-thumping about those miscreant Gators, has profiled attorney Huntley Johnson, who often handles the players' legal run-ins. What the paper doesn't mention: Johnson once suggested that his secretary "get down" on his "hog" and "honk it."...

Depressed Urban Zone Saved By Valiant Sports Team
All of Pittsburgh's troubles as a shrunken post-war manufacturing center are over now that the city has its third Stanley Cup championship and its second major sports title this year. Detroit, sadly, will be boarded up and shipped to Borneo....

Revisiting The Long, Unhappy Police Interview Of Kobe Bean Bryant
Kobe Bryant's one win away from winning his first post-Shaq NBA title, which will effectively end all The Kobe Hate. For history's sake, then, perhaps it's time to revisit a certain 57-page transcript released just less than five years ago....

Nicklas Lidstrom's Busted Ballsack And Other Tales Of NHL Woe
If Detroit captain Nicklas Lidstrom looked a little sluggish at times during this Stanley Cup Finals, he has a very, very, very good excuse. He suffered a "nearly catastrophic" testicle injury in the Conference Finals. Now how do you feel?...

Alabama Football Forced To Give Up Wins
Alabama's football program will be placed on probation today and be forced to vacate at least 10 (and as many as 21) wins from the 2005-07 season. That ... hurts?...

Stan Van Gundy A "Working-Class Hero," Says Newspaper For Rich People (UPDATE)
There is no worse fate for an NBA final than to be turned into a roundtable discussion on the brilliance of the coach. Someone please tell the Wall Street Journal: Stan Van Gundy is not the reason people are watching....

Bob Huggins Now Sporting Non-Metaphorical Black Eyes
Huggins, the bail bondsman who coaches college basketball games in his spare time, showed up to a fundraiser wearing shiners on either eye. The explanation? He lost a fight with his bathroom door. It happens....

Raul Ibanez Has A Few Things To Get Off His Chest
The 37-year-old Phillies left fielder, who's having a remarkable Ted Williams-like season, has discovered his success will bring out the skeptics and the awful PED rumor-mongering. He addressed those non-believers who question his body's legitimacy....

Today Everyone Is Finally Convinced Kobe Bryant Is One Of The NBA's Greatest Despite His Shaq-Filled, Jizz Bomb Past
The Lakers still need two more games to close out the Magic, but those people who never doubted Kobe's true greatness for most of his career are filing early to get a leg up on those who did....

George Foreman III Wins First Professional "Fight"
One of George Foreman's eponymous sons began his illustrious boxing career with a time-honored tradition—beating up on a human tomato can. Everyone involved in the making of this post should be ashamed of themselves. (I know I am.)...

How Reggie Miller Is Spending His Summer Vacation
Reggie Miller's belly-button-circling tattoo is hideously ugly and misplaced, but maybe that's the point....

Jamal Anderson Talks About His Bathroom Cocaine Arrest, Gets Self-Helpy
"What are you going to do? Are you going to ball up and go into a corner? Or are you going to make the best of that after the fact?" Month Of Fury! [SRI]...

Jimmy Johnson: A Lovable Scamp Just Dancing Through Life
KSK spotlights this Le Batard column detailing the silver-haired coach's quest to live life like a Jimmy Buffet song. Pirate party next week at JJ's! [KSK]...

The First Cut Is The Deepest
If a hockey team scores the first goal of the game in the first five minutes, they have a 70% of winning the game. Just don't tell Gary Bettman or NHL games will only last six minutes. [Live Science]...

Oh, Courtney
Beautiful play, but flawed execution. Courtney Lee probably needed .2 of a second more to make that layup instead of bonking it off the backboard. Instead, Lakers win in OT, go up 2-0. [ESPN]...

Barca Loon Attempts To Rattle Federer With Annoying Flag-To-The-Face Taunt
During the second set of the French Open, Roger Federer was hassled by a person waving a Barcelona flag, who somehow managed to make his way onto the Roland Garros court and get all up in Federer's face....

Yes, We've Seen The Alleged Kobe Accuser Rap Video. No, It's Not Actually Her.
So this video you guys keeping sending us? The one called "KOBE'S ACCUSER FREESTYLE RAPS"? Here's the thing: It's not Kobe's accuser. Meet Whitney Teubner, Los Angeles-based funny lady and member of comedy troupe Studio Fred. [Studio Fred]...