ap Page 1493 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Principal Of School That Administered 100-0 Beating Offers To Forfeit The Win
Covenant School, the Texas high school that beat crosstown Dallas Academy 100-0 in a girls basketball game recently, is feeling somewhat remorseful over their little ass-kicking display....
Super Bowl Sub-Plot #1: Whisenhunt vs. Roethlisberger
There are several key storylines that will beaten into the ground by everyone who covers the Super Bowl for over the next two weeks. We will beat them down even further....
Congratulations On Your New Acquisition, Boston!
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Nine-Fingered Kobe Enough To Stop LeBron James
How confident is Kobe Bryant that he deserves the MVP Award? He intentionally dislocated his right ring finger before their game last night and still dispatched the Cavaliers with relative ease....
Willis McGahee Says He's Fine, Ready For Next Concussion
"I'm all right. Everything is OK. The MRI and the CAT scan checked out good. I was scared, but I didn't know how serious it was. It was pretty intense." [Baltimore Sun]...
Raise Your Hand If You Like Tennis
Hey, gang. The Australian Open is under way! Seriously, does anyone care about this, because I am honestly curious about the state of tennis' popularity. [Aussie Open]...
Tim Tebow Is Really Starting To Push It
The Tebow-ner dramatically pulls the sling off his injured shoulder to the titillating delight of thousands of slobbering Florida Gator basketball fans. Who does he think he is? Macho Man Savage? [AP]...
How To Elude An Angry Kangaroo, And Other Helpful NBA Tips
The Raptors' Nathan Juwai is probably the only NBA player to nearly get eaten by a crocodile. [NBA Fanhouse]...
Your Super Bowl Buzzsaw Matchup: Pittsburgh vs. Arizona
In two weeks, the Pittsburgh Steelers will face the Ari... Arizo... I almost can't even say it, it sounds so strange... Arizona Cardinals... for the world championship of American football....
Jump For Joy! There's A Hockey Game On Today!
NBC is broadcasting a regular season NHL game today ... on TV even! Rangers at Penguins (probably sans Crosby), 12:30 p.m. ET. Let's watch that! [NBC]...
Jim Schwartz To Become Detroit's Greatest Hero
It seems fitting that the Tennessee Titans' defensive coordinator is the man who has been chosen to resurrect the pitiful Detroit Lions....
Tony Dungy: Bad For Gays? Good For Blacks? Great For Everybody? Let's Go To The Tape...
The retirement of Tony Dungy has brought forth some divided opinions from two different sets of minorities about the coach's legacy as a human being....
Capitals Win, Crosby Goes Down
The highly-touted matchup between Washington and Pittsburgh mostly lived up to its billing. The teams still hate each other and the play was intense, but the Caps eventually put the Penguins to bed, 6-3....
The Downside Of Doing Your Teacher
We've covered many, many instances of teacher/student-athlete fornication. The latest issue of Rolling Stone reveals that even though it seems like every teenage boy's fantasy, it can really fuck a kid up....
Why Can't Alexander Ovechkin and Evgeni Malkin Just Get Along?
The Penguins and Capitals square off again tonight and this growing rivalry may have just the kind of storyline the NHL needs to get some buzz going—an old world Russian blood feud....
How To Understand The NBA Salary Cap In 106 Easy Steps
No one understands the NBA salary cap better than Larry Coon. That's because no one on Earth understands the NBA salary cap besides Larry Coon....
Despite Failure Of 'Pants Off For The Panthers', Fan Will Continue To Remove Pants
Add this to the Arizona Cardinals' list of impressive accomplishments: On Saturday they beat the previously undefeated mojo of the 'Pants Off For The Panthers' movement....
Jake Delhomme Knows Exactly What Happened To Him
"The fumble, I credit them," he said. "The guy had his head turned to me and just swiped." Panther swiped. Pitt should really pick up on this. [Winston-Salem Journal]...
So Which Carolina Panther Loves The Whores?
According to PFT, at least one Carolina football player will be named in a huge Charlotte prostitution sting. Panther swipe. [PFT]...
Tony Dungy Bids Adieu
Jay Glazer sobers up from his New Year's party and pounces on the Tony Dungy retirement scoop. Presser at 5 p.m. today. [Fox Sports]...