ap Page 1498 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Illegal Contact, Packers, 15 Yards And Automatic Loss Of Beer
It's two days later, and all of North Carolina is still in a lather over this Packers fan, who took exception to the Panthers' DeAngelo Williams tossing his touchdown footballs to Carolina fans in the front row of the end zone stands at Lambeau. This one was completed, but the next one was successfu...
The French Get A Real Kick Out Of Stretcher Mishaps
There's something about the game of soccer that lends itself to stretcher mishaps; lucky for us. And when it happens in France, where the medics dress as if they're expecting a hotel fire, all the more hilarious. At any rate, add the above video to my collection, which is chronicled below....
Brian Burke Officially In As President, GM of Terrible Hockey Team
Starting today, the Toronto Maple Leafs can scratch "incompetent and/or old GM" off the list of reasons why they never win anything. Yes, in the least surprising news to come out of the NHL since Gary Bettman admitted he didn't know how to read or write, the Leafs announced that Brian Burke will ta...
Train Wreck of a Woman Who Had Hawkeye Sex in Bathroom Stall Comes Clean
We featured this as a quicklink, but given the amount of attention this poor woman is getting due to her unfortunate drunken sexcapades at the Iowa/Minnesota game last week, it's probably worth another look....
Jamboroo, Week 13. THANKSGIVING EDITION, In Which Chad Ocho Cinco Tells You The Story Of The First Thanksgiving
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs, well, every Thursday afternoon during the NFL season. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," featuring 100% new material, is available in stores and online here, and makes a lovely Christmas gift for the chronic masturbator in your life. You...
Obama Knows How To Keep His Chicago Press Corp Happy
Well, President elect Barack Obama continues to show the world that his sports fandom was not an act to just to get on SportsCenter. At yesterday's briefing, reporters were separated into Sox and Cubs sections. In today's briefing, a reporter was singled out for an apology as he, a devoted Sox fan, ...
Myron Rolle, Gentleman (Rhodes) Scholar
I'm sure you've heard the tale of Florida State safety Myron Rolle, who won a Rhodes Scholarship on Saturday afternoon in Alabama, then flew to Maryland (on a plane, we assume) played in his team's game that night, then killed a wild boar with his bare hands and fed his entire squad with it at the p...
ESPN Mag To Get a Sharapova-cized Makeover
Each year, ESPN "The Magazine" trots out special issues like the goofy jocks-are-in-charge issue one when they let a professional athlete play editor for the week. (Remember one year Matt Leinart did this. Yeah, it'll probably be a long time before he gets on the cover again.) This year the mag has...
Ravens Slingshot Back Into AFC Playoff Picture
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap Oh, eventually you will stop, Brian Westbrook, yes you will. Baltimore's Althea Barnes makes the play, although where Westbrook's forward progress is marked is anyone's guess. Kind...
Phil Savage Finally Apologizes For His Impassioned Expletive in E-mail Freakout to Fan
Well. Who would've thought a story like this could get so much attention? And, hey — even ESPN.com took off the web censors and let the AP's "as first reported by Deadspin.com" into its online copy. I'm flattered that they acknowledge our uncanny ability to carefully sift through our inbox. And now,...
George Karl Does Not Miss Allen Iverson
So how is that Allen Iverson for Chauncey Billups trade working out? Funny you should ask! The Nuggets are 5-1 since adding Billups. The Pistons are just 3-3 with A.I., but they did win three straight on the road and gave the Los Angeles Lakers their first loss of the season. So everyone's happy, ri...
Of Superbikes And Food Metaphors: FJM's Greatest Hits
A sports blog's success is usually measured by page views or unique visitors — these odd, mysterious numbers that merely serve as advertiser bait, but are woefully inaccurate in revealing overall quality. The true measure of a successful sports blog, like most other creative endeavors done for the r...
Meet The Only Professional Pitcher Who Has Seen 'High School Musical' Eight Times
I don't know; the whole thing sounds a little sketchy to me. But let's take it from the top: Eri Yoshida, a 16-year-old schoolgirl, has been drafted by the Kobe 9 Cruise, a new independent Japanese professional league based in Tokyo. It will be the first time that a chick of the female persuasion wi...
Dodgers Fans Need Bailout for Spring Training Tickets
The tough economic conditions are hitting all of us, my friends, and the sporting world is not immune from feeling the effects. From NASCAR's cancellation of test runs next season to the New Jersey Nets offering free tickets to the unemployed, businesses will do what they have to in order to survive...
According to Jemele Hill, Warren Sapp Deserves a Pounding for Keyshawn "Bitch" Comment
Here's an amusing little snag from Awful Announcing, featuring current "Inside the NFL" analyst Warren Sapp and budding home decorator/"NFL Live" analyst, Keyshawn Johnson. Sapp was responding to viewer questions during his "Ask Warren Anything" segment. One viewer was curious about Sapp's thoughts...
Fun With Babies: More Horrifying Tales From The Phillies Parade
Just like Vietnam, it may be decades before the entire tragic picture of the Phillies victory parade finally comes into focus. More disturbing details emerge each day, including this video, in which this excitable Phils fan can't stop fist-pumping, and in the process nearly jettisons his kid. But...
A Little Trash Talk For Your Tuesday
First, the reasons Kevin Garnett's taunting actions here are a big bowl of wrong: the finger-waving gestures you see in the stills and in the video below are from the movie Bring It On. What? Kevin Garnett is a 15-year-old girl? Also, after all that tongue-wagging and gesturing, Jose Calderon whistl...
Mike Van Ryn Is Having A Rough Year
The NHL season is only a few weeks old, but for Toronto Maple Leafs defenseman Mike Van Ryn it probably feels like an eternity. Back in October, he removed a pane of glass from the boards in Boston with his face and on Saturday night he was on the receiving end of this rather nasty boarding penalty...
Alabama-LSU: A Friendly Game Of Murder
What a game, huh!? The No. 1 team in the country was taken to overtime on Saturday, the atmosphere was electric, clothes were burned and everyone had a good old SEC time! Well, except for a couple of LSU fans who maybe got a little too carried away by the emotions of the day and ended up the victims...
High School Kids Choose Phillies Over Football
Much like the site you're reading now, there were some attendance problems last Friday in certain Philadelphia area school systems. Reports say that as much as 20 percent of the area's students licked their palms and skipped school so they could be sworn at by Chase Utley. Among that group are nine ...