ap Page 1499 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Buck Burnette Just Can't Stop Apologizing for Absent-Minded Facebook Racism
After Texas backup center Buck Burnette was kicked off the team for his idiotic Facebook status comment, he issued a sincere apology that, at the very least, proved he knew what he did was wrong. The online contrition tour continues for Burnette, and now he's fired off another apology via Longhorn f...
Cocaine Is A Helluva Drug
That's the second time that phrase has been used today, but in this case it seems much more appropriate. This will air on Friday's "Best Damn Sports Show Period". I love how terrified Chris Rose looks after it happens. It's almost like he's just realized that Lawrence Taylor is, in fact, crazy and ...
Your Halloween Costume Was Not This Good
I went to two pretty decent Halloween parties last weekend and saw a lot of clever costumes—Tony Stark with glowing chest plate, Anton Chigurh, Carmen Sandiego, Sewer Urchin, half the cast of "The Maltese Falcon," two Sarah Palins, 16 Jokers, and a dude in a Chinese gymnast leotard. But none—none—of...
Allen Iverson Traded: The Day After
So Allen Iverson is now a Piston. And Chauncey Billiups is heading back to Colorado. And the world now knows the name Cheikh Samb. But what does it mean for Detroit, Denver, Antonio McDyess and the rest of the NBA? Detailed analysis, educated guesses, wild speculation and whatever the hell Woody Pai...
Brett Myers and The Philadelphia Police Department Welcome you To Watch Monday Night Football With Them
So here's a fun photo taken in the early morning hours after the decisive game 5, when Phillies pitcher Brett Myers was stopped by Philly police officers after he attempted to cross over a blocked off portion of Broad Street. At first Myers was told he couldn't pass, but once several officers recogn...
Bengals Jerk Line Gets Its Chain Yanked
As you may have heard, the NFL is out to hunt down and destroy boorish fan behavior at its solemn and dignified Sunday skull crushing meetings. Like several other teams, the Cincinnati Bengals have what is known as a "Jerk Line," a phone number that fans can call while in the stadium to report the g...
Toronto Writer To Maple Leaf Fans: It's All Your Fault
It's still early in the NHL season, but the Toronto Maple Leafs are solidly in 4th place—right where they've belonged for the past three seasons. If you're not familiar with the rules of ice hockey, that's bad. However, the organization that owns the team—Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment—is doing...
How The Deadspin Editorship Ruins Your Personal Life, But Saves Your Team
It wasn't long after Brad Lidge struck out Eric Hinske with a dirtball slider on Wednesday night that the posts started popping up about the eerie connection between being Deadspin's lead editor and the World Series champion. Fans of the Texas Rangers, Chicago Cubs, Kansas City Royals, lobbied for o...
Dispatches From The Phillies Victory Parade
Breaking News: We have a Daulerio sighting. Your Deadspin editor has been spotted at the Locust Bar at 235 S 10th St., engaged in drunken post-parade revelry with someone named Jim (and later, I'm sure, to be known as "Suspect B"). A courageous reader sent this cell phone shot at great personal risk...
Gentlemen, Start Your Hangovers
God only knows where Daulerio is or what he's doing at this hour; hopefully he wasn't involved in the carnage above. Was that a bus shelter? Anyway, the last I heard from him was in a garbled cell phone message, screaming something about attending today's Phillies' victory parade. So don't be surpri...
Media Approval Ratings: Jeanne Zelasko
If you were in attendance at Citizens Bank Ballpark last night, the first voice you may have heard over the loudspeaker after your team won the championship was that of Jeanne Zelasko. And while I have nothing against Jeanne Zelasko personally, I’m not exactly sure she was the right person to have ...
The Deadspin Polygraph Test! Will Leitch!
Welcome to the Deadspin Polygraph Test, where I choose a random person in the sports world and subject them to a series of embarrassing and deeply personal questions, almost all of which involve sex or poop. They can only answer yes or no. Now, I don’t posses an actual polygraph machine here. So I’...
Your World Series Blogdome
What they’re saying around the nefarious pornwebs in the wake of Philadelphia winning their first major sports title in a quarter-century. PHILLY.COM: “Brad Lidge struck out Eric Hinske with an 0-2 slider at 9:58 p.m. last night at Citizens Bank Park to capture the Phillies' first World Series cham...
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSss
And only, like, five people died! Seriously, this is the greatest, bestest thing in the world. As a fan of your favorite team, I hope you do experience it. I never, EVER thought i would. Yeah, that's a car tipped over. See you tomorrow! PHILADELPHIA PHILLIES: WORLD SERIES CHAMPS! GOD, FUCK ME IN THE...
Us Did It! Phillies Are World Series Champions
They sure took their sweet time, but after the most adrenaline-packed three-and-a-half innings of baseball all year (maybe ever?) the Phillies take the lead twice, with the second one sticking for a 4-3 victory, vanquishing the Tampa Bay Rays in five games. Geoff Jenkins led off the game with a pinc...
World Series Game Five Live Blog 33-1/3: The Final Insult
Last time on "World Series Test Cricket," our Philadelphia Phillies and Tampa Bay Rays were tied 2-2 in the middle of the 6th inning. Please slip on the underwear you adorned on Tuesday (or, if you want to be accurate, Monday) and jump like it's October 27th. * * *Top 9th 3 ...
Unfortunate Babies Poised For Lifetime Of Regret
I'm quite certain that, should he win on Nov. 4, the first order of business in the new Barack Obama administration will be to end the practice of parents naming their children after sports stars. Sadly it's too late for little Cole and Chase Ryan, born just prior to Monday's Great Rain Delay and na...
This Is Why We Can't Have Two-Way Football Players Anymore
College and pro sports are dirty cesspools of corruption, greed, and underhanded malfeasance, but they've got nothing on the cutthroat world of high school football. Just ask Taysom Hill, a star quarterback from Highland High School in Idaho, who is committed to Stanford. Recent opponent and cross-...
Mystery Phillies Bud Selig Chastiser Identified! (We Think)
Three sources have come forward to reveal the identity of the mystery Philadelphia Phillie responsible for the now-famous quote about Bud Selig on Monday. Upon seeing Selig in the Phillies' clubhouse following the postponement of Game 5 due to rain, a Phillies pitcher looked at him and said: "That f...
Loaded Feature Stories That Make It Abundantly Clear Why Newspapers Suck
Yes, that's Brett Myers, Phillies number two pitcher, who many of you only know as the man who punched his wife in the face outside a Boston bar back in June of 2006. Given his penchant for violence and dickheaded outbursts, it would seem completely ridiculous for a newspaper to do a feature story o...