as Page 2297 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
NFL Season Preview: Washington Redskins
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, we have to go this early. So there you have it....
MLB.tv Is Five ... Buffering ... Years ... Buffering ... Old
We have a subscription to MLB.tv, one that we use the same way we use, say, a miniature tube of toothpaste. It's only needed when we're on the road, it's never quite the brand we like, but it works in a pinch despite its obvious inferiority to the real thing. (It also ends up staining our suitcase, ...
Hey Everyone, Look Who's Back!
Yes, David Wells is now a Dodger. For in-depth analysis of this move, we of course go to Touch 'Em All, Alyssa Milano's comprehensive Dodgers blog. Hmm, nothing. Well, I should have guessed. (Those headbands do look nice, though)....
About Last Night
What you missed while celebrating the birthday of the Big Mac ... • NFL: Preseason ... How's that hangover, Packers fans? Jacksonville 21, Green Bay 13. • MLB: Amazing! Rangers explode again for, uh, never mind. Seattle 9, Texas 4. • Basketball: Take THAT, U.S. Virgin Islands. And THAT. Any other is...
Your Socks Appear To Be Somewhat Damp
There are so many teams in sports with terrible nicknames. We're not talking about the Redskins; we mean legitimately stupid ones. We think there might be nothing worse than the Toronto Raptors; does anyone even remember Jurassic Park anymore? And don't get us started on the 54,234 teams named "Wild...
How Not To Help A Player Cheat In Class
If you're going to cheat in class to help a college athlete, it's probably a wise idea to at least pretend to try to hide it. Use a fake email account, wear a fake mustache, something. Cover your tracks a little, you know?...
NFL Season Preview: Pittsburgh Steelers
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, we have to go this early. So there you have it....
Mr. Peabody Instructs Sherman To Set The Wayback Machine To 1897
Just to put the Texas Rangers' 30-3 win over the Batimore Orioles on Wednesday into proper perspective, we take you now to 1897, the last time a Major League team cracked the 30-run barrier. It was a glorious, two-fisted era in baseball, when an umpire could be arrested twice in the same season for ...
Philly Paper Can't Get Rid Of Stephen A. Fast Enough
Yesterday, we told you how Phawker reported that Stephen A. Smith was being stripped of his Philadelphia Inquirer column. Well, the Inquirer confirmed it yesterday in a story that's as passive-aggressively hostile as the snippiest inner office memo....
The Appropriate Way To Showcase Your Team Loyalty
We're still a month and a half from the ole Red River rivalry game between Oklahoma and Texas, and, as always, emotions are running high. How high? Oh, "bust open the opposing fan's scrotum" high. (That's pretty high.)...
Those 30-Run Rallies Will Kill You Every Time
Little did you know that when you watched Maracaibo, Venezuela beat the Netherlands, 21-2 in the Little League World Series on Tuesday, that it wouldn't be the most embarrassing wipeout of week. Meet your 2007 Baltimore Orioles, who lost 30-3 to the Texas Rangers on Wednesday. For Texas, it was the...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while doing hard time for sausage assault ... • MLB: Brandon Webb's shutout streak has ended, and he couldn't be happier. Arizona 3, Milwaukee 2. • Little League World Series: Chandler Arizona, still gettin' it done. My sentimental friends. Affirmed. • Soccer: David Beckham plays an ...
Brandon Webb, Still Shutting People Down
Tonight, against the first-place (for now!) Milwaukee Brewers, Arizona pitcher Brandon Webb is attempting to extend his 42 consecutive inning scoreless sheet. He's 17 innings away from tying Orel Hershiser's record of 59 — Orel Hershiser married a girl from Mattoon, by the way — and that's just two ...
George Mitchell, Still Slogging Along
In March 2006, we — Rick, actually — wrote, about the announcement of George Mitchell's steroid panel, "it would seem any investigation would have to be so wide-ranging that Bonds could either surpass Ruth and Aaron or retire before it can be completed." We thought that was ridiculous, and we believ...
NFL Season Preview: Green Bay Packers
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, we have to go this early. So there you have it....
Stephen A. Smith's Caps Lock To Get A Well-Deserved Break
You might have wondered, with STEPHEN A. SMITH'S!!!!! frequent outside-of-the-newspaper endeavors (screaming on "SportsCenter," screaming on "General Hospital," screaming at Skip Bayless, screaming at Cheesy Doodles), what his Philadelphia Inquirer editors thought of his output, considering the guy ...
Now That, Friends, Is A Nice Night
So, you had tickets to the Angels game on Tuesday, but decided instead to go see Daddy Day Care. You foolish, foolish man.* You missed The Garret Anderson Carnival of the Unexplained, as our hero had 10 RBI ... yeah, 10 ... before 44,264 highly-caffeinated Angelistas, as the Angels blasted the Yanke...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while waxing on and waxing off ... • MLB: Pujols does that thing he does as Cards beat Marlins 5-2 ... St. Louis still three behind Brewers and Cubs in Central. • Little League World Series: It was raining in Williamsport, so naturally the team from Oregon won. • Tennis: It's raining...
This Also Happens Often To Swimmers
SCANDAL at the University of Hawaii! Apparently, some fella named Ian Sample, who used to play football for the Rainbows, claims coach June Jones used to manipulate drug tests. We're not sure we understand what the big deal is — if you can't get stoned playing for Hawaii, dammit, where can you get s...
NFL Preview: San Francisco 49ers
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, we have to go this early. So there you have it....