as Page 2309 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

About Last Night ...
What you missed while purchasing donut-flavored ice cream ... • MLB: Tigers' revenge ... Twins get swept. That'll teach 'em. • Soccer: You know what I always say ... it's not really a soccer brawl until someone gets tasered. • Golf: An Irishman is in danger of winning the British Open for the first ...

Thanks For The Interview, Now Sign This
These days, being a beat reporter has all kinds of rules. But one of the bigger ones? Please don't ask the players for their autograph. It would destroy the delicate illusion that reporters are actual impartial observers who just happen to cover some of the most famous people on the planet. A Japane...

Simmons Meets Isiah And ... That's It?
Taking a break from his Big Mysterious NBA Book Project, The Sports Feller files his magazine column today and includes a bit of a bombshell: He had a half-hour conversation with Isiah Thomas while in Vegas....

Beware The Tempest That Is The Chicago Cubs
Hey, thanks for reviving me; those smelling salts really did the trick. If you hadn't come along when you did, I would have missed my bus. It's just that something I heard a few minutes ago really shocked me, and I went down like a carp. Passed right out. Yep, just two little sentences, uttered in t...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while reading Strunk & White's Elements of Style ... • MLB: He owes it all to clean living ... Griffey collects 2,500th hit, Reds win. • Tennis: Marat Safin advances at ATP Countrywide Classic. Very nice! • Golf: Tiger, Choi first to top of leaderboard at British Open. But it's raini...

Tony Romo's Heart Will Go On
Ladies, it's useless to resist; the smooth musical stylings of Tony Romo are destined to capture your heart. The American Century Celebrity Golf Tournament is over, but left behind is this treasured memento, taken at the Center Stage Club at Harrah's Lake Tahoe on Saturday night. I will not rest un...

The Red Sox Sewing Circle Now Officially Includes Simmons
We don't quite understand all the weird little in-jokes and politics of Boston Red Sox baseball, and, for this, we find ourselves rather fortunate. So maybe a Sox fan can translate this for us, because, apparently, NESN broadcaster Jerry Remy ripped into The Sports Feller on the Boston broadcast las...

The Duke Can Beat You In Many, Many Ways
I admit to being no huge fan of the designated hitter rule. I like that fact that there is at least one pronounced difference between the leagues, but baseball is all about my nine vs. your nine ... and that includes the lazy-ass pitcher (I'm talking about you, Clemens). If the NL had the DH, then w...

About Last Night ...
What you missed during your shocking slapfest ... • MLB: All hail El Duque, stealer of bases, and of our hearts! Mets 7, Padres 0. • Tour de France: Top o' the world, ma! Juan Mauricio Soler pedals nimbly through the Alps. • Pan Am Games: OK, question. If I e-mailed Shawn Johnson to congratulate her...

The Braves Know What Their Fans Want
After all this super-secret-memo and banned-monologue business today, it's probably fitting to wrap matters up with something we can all come together on: BEER....

You Cannot Handle The Truth Of Bill James
We are a longtime admirer of famed baseball thinker Bill James. (We might make fun of Rob Neyer a bit around here, but we — like a lot of you, we suspect — have Neyer to thank for our initial awareness of James' work.) He opened our eyes to so many new concepts in the game we love, and, all told, we...

ESPN's Secret Interoffice Complaint Memorandum
Sometimes we forget, in all the frustrations and angst that watching ESPN causes us, that Bristol really is just an office. An office with a cafeteria, a human resources department, water coolers, parking spaces and football analysts who take pictures of their penis. It's like all of our offices. So...

Ruminations On Scott Van Pelt
So we've been receiving a little bit of blowback after our rather inexplicable appearance on ESPN Radio with Scott Van Pelt on Friday. Mainly, we think people wanted us to have some sort of Jon Stewart on "Crossfire" moment; during our brief appearance on the airwaves, we should have, apparently, go...

A Baby Name Which Will Cause No Future Embarrassment Whatsoever
When all is said and done, I blame the mom. When your last name is Karr, and dad comes up with the brilliant idea of naming the new baby Chevy, that's when you put your foot down, ladies. And you put it down hard ... on dad's genitals while he's sleeping, if necessary. And if he still insists, then ...

Elijah Dukes' Divorce Proceedings, Shockingly, Are Getting Nasty
As you probably might expect, the wife of "troubled" Devil Rays outfielder Elijah Dukes is filing for divorce. (This tends to happen when you send your wife's cell phones photos of guns.) She has come up with some not-really-all-that-surprising accusations....

Phillies Get Started On The Next 10,000
I think we all remember the halcyon days of April 1883; a simpler time, when Chester Allen Arthur was President, the Brooklyn Bridge had just opened and the Philadelphia Phillies franchise had no losses whatsoever....