Derrick Henry Went Old School And Embarrassed The Jaguars
Derrick Henry did much, much more last night against the Jaguars than run 99 yards, impale All-Pro corner A.J. Bouye…
Darren Rovell Gets New Job, Completes Calcification Of His Brain
ESPN sports business dullard Darren Rovell, a sensitive penis who leads a truly harrowing life and has never reported…
Darren Rovell, Theater Major, Is Actually Kind Of Likable
It has always seemed like Darren Rovell cherished nothing more than farting out press releases to Twitter, writing embar…
Darren Rovell On Fake Headline He Wrote 12 Hours Earlier: "It’s Just Really Bad"
Darren Rovell, an AI who aims to drive Earth’s entire population insane through the banality of its observations,…
Darren Rovell Tries To Explain Economics To Marvin Jones, Gets Dunked On
“Actually,” Darren Rovell probably smirked as he adjusted his bowtie before lecturing a celebratory Marvin Jones, who…
Darren Rovell Plays Basketball Like A Tortured Soul Who Writes About Sports Business
ESPN sports business reporter and press-release dumpster Darren Rovell plays D like he has suddenly been stricken with…
Is This Darren Rovell's Ass Or Crotch?
And also, how did he take this picture?
How To Mangle A Survey, By Darren Rovell
If you merely scanned today’s Darren Rovell ESPN article on a new survey of NFL fans, you might be forgiven for coming…
ESPN's Darren Rovell Wastes Everyone's Time With Dopey Column
The Golden State Warriors just spent the first two games of the NBA Finals dominating the Cleveland Cavaliers in…
ESPN's Darren Rovell Has Always Been Like This, Apparently
Prolific tweeting cornball Darren Rovell has a pretty cute story about Jeff Bagwell coming to his bar mitzvah on ESPN…
ESPN’s Darren Rovell: I’m A Robot, I Pity The Humans
This evening, at 10:21 p.m. EDT, Darren Rovell reached his terrifying final form.
MLB Owns Darren Rovell Online For Posting Erroneous Picture
Darren Rovell—a living, breathing blazer from Northwestern’s business school—is fond of tweeting out pictures.…
Deadspin Awards: Worst Tweet
The Deadspin Awards are in July, and we need our readers to decide the winners of these prestigious honors. Today, we…
Internet Man Flays Post-Human ESPN Shithead Darren Rovell By Tunelessly Singing His Dumb Tweets (UPDATE: There's More)
Post-human business doof Darren Rovell did some tweets tonight, like he does whenever a dollar farts. They were bad and…
ESPN's Darren Rovell On Nike Exploiting Chinese Workers: "It Is What It Is"
ESPN business reporter Darren Rovell, a man with many unread issues of The Economist in his bathroom, has a habit of…