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Things To Do In Albuquerque When You're Drunk
How to know when you have a drinking problem:...

Steve Francis Will Attempt To Love Stephon Marbury As He Once Loved Cuttino Mobley
And Larry Brown will hate them both....

A Differing View On Davis' Trip Into The Stands
Deadspin reader Tom Malkin was in a section right by Antonio Davis' wife during the incident at the United Center last night, and he has a very different take on what actually happened prior to Davis' stomp upstairs. Here's an excerpt:...

What Really Happened In The Stands? Nothing.
As most of you have probably already seen this morning, Knicks forward Antonio Davis ran into the stands last night in Chicago to "protect his wife from an intoxicated fan." Davis said, "I saw him touch her, and I know I should not have acted the way I did, but I would have felt terrible if I didn...

This Is Not A Picture Of Chastity Bono
Far be it from us to mock a guy for going back to rediscover his roots and promote the game of baseball internationally ... but sweet God, what has happened to former Reds reliever Danny Graves? When you get back from Vietnam, before you head to Indians training camp ... might we suggest a workou...

Poll: Isiah Wins, But It's Closer Than You Think
Well, the results are in from our poll about a theoretical (for now) fight between Isiah Thomas and Bill Simmons, and, well, we're rather shocked: You give Simmons a lot better chance of winning this duel than we possibly could have though. Out of Deadspin readers, 46.2 percent of you think Simmo...

A-Rod Finally Stops Spinning
Honestly, we're starting to get a little embarrassed to even post about this, but hey, we're here, this is our job, this is what we do ... it's time for another Alex Rodriguez in the World Baseball Classic post. (We've covered this, let's see, here, here and here.)...

The Long Road Of Sean Payton
If you missed it, the New Orleans Saints hired Cowboys assistant head coach Sean Payton to be its new head coach. We feel somewhat uniquely qualified to discuss this hire, because, by pure happenstance, we've been following Payton's football career since we were about 10 years old....

Isiah Thomas. Bill Simmons. Quien Es Mas Macho?
In one of those stories that almost seem too good to be true around here, it appears that good ole' Bill Simmons has been threatened by Knicks general "manager" Isiah Thomas on — of all things — Stephen A. Smith's radio show. In his newest "More Cowbell" post, a Simmons reader writes in:...

The End Of Shaq Is Nigh
We couldn't have been more thoroughly depressed by last night's Lakers-Heat matchup, otherwise known as Shaq-Kobe II (or IV, or whatever). Aside from the much-heralded but mostly boring "peace accord" between Shaq and Kobe, and aside from the game itself (the Lakers finally beat Shaq), we were dow...

Tom, Interrupted
I was curious about how Patriots fans would react to the loss last night, since they have so infrequently experienced that thing called losing. Understandably, not many Pats blogs have been updated. But a few of the diehards who realize the therapeautic nature of blogging did manage get some thoug...

Week in Deadspin: Yay, for the Baby!
· Clinton Portis shocks the crap out of everyone by appearing at Redskins weekly press conference as...himself....

Virginia Cartoonist Can Predict Your Future
From the Life Immitates Art Department of the Fredricksburg Free Lance-Star:...

Playoff Pants Party! Patriots at Broncos
Once again we find the Patriots fighting in one of those "respect" games. This week, the disrespected team is the Denver Broncos, who really nobody has any faith in whatsoever regardless of their record, Jake Plummer's "maturity" and the fact their defense has been surprisingly solid all year—with m...

Randy McMichael's Refreshing Candor
It's been about 48 hours since the Eagles officially gave agent Drew Rosenhaus permission to shop around his star client, Terrell Owens, and, um, let's just say this about the response so far: Drew can go to the movies without worrying about his cell phone bothering anyone. In fact, one of Rosenhau...

What Could Be The Greatest Sports Story Ever
The man you see in this picture is Kevin Rogers. A football lifer, he is most famous for being Donovan McNabb's quarterback coach at Syracuse. He and his wife Betty are the parents of three. Earlier today, Rogers was hired by new coach Brad Childress to become the quarterbacks coach for the Minnes...

New Mexico Packs Some Serious Heat
We've received a lot of amusing PhotoShop montages involving former Virginia Tech quarterback Marcus "New Mexico" Vick, but, for some reason, we think this is our favorite one....

OK, The Knicks Are Starting To Freak Us Out
Last night, the Knicks — the New York Knicks — won their fifth straight game, beating the Dallas Mavericks 117-115 in overtime. (We had tickets to this game but had to turn them down; hey, "Yes, Dear" was on.) These weren't weak wins either; they beat Cleveland on the road, and Phoenix and now Dal...

Poll Results: Super-Size New Mexico!
You have spoken, dear readers, and it's perhaps little surprise that you'd be most afraid to run into Marcus "New Mexico" Vick at your local McDonald's. You know what's cool, though? He has a THUG LIFE tattoo across his McRib....

Poll: Whom Do You Least Want To Run Into At McDonald's?
We still haven't quite come to terms with the bat-shit crazy weirdness of Marcus "New Mexico" Vick whipping out a gun at McDonald's the day after he declared for the NFL Draft, but it did get us to thinking: We haven't been to McDonald's for a long, long time. At first, we thought it was because w...