i Page 7626 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Some Monday Afternoon Championship Golf For You
The US Open playoff — and how cool is it that they make the two people who tie play another 18 holes the next day? — tees off in about 20 minutes. As Jason Sobel put it, it's Tiger's knee vs. Tiger's brain. Or, as we put it, it's Tiger's knee against Rocco Mediate's male pattern baldness. Don't worr...
Cardinals Are Just Barely Hanging On
In George Carlin's noted examination of the differences between baseball and football, he describes baseball as "A 19th century pastoral game. Baseball begins in the spring; the season of new life. The idea is to go home. I just want to go home." True, for the most part; save for the occasional har...
Tim Russert Was A Grand Thespian
Acting! What's more fun than seeing Russert saying, "it's all about the Benjamins" while doing a fist bump? If you haven't seen Luke Russert's interview this morning with "Today," we recommend doing so immediately, but only when no one's around, lest your boss make fun of you for weeping. We still t...
Sasha Vujacic's New Best Pal
So here's a reason to enjoy the "intimacy" of NBA basketball: Guys like Irv Bauman here can, right in the middle of the action, just start talking to one of the players. Can you fathom what he might be saying to Sasha Vujacic here?...
The Finals Are Goin' Back To Beantown
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who can't decide whether he likes the fact that ginormous leads are not safe when these teams play. When he's not silently wondering what's going to happen in Game 6, he can be found staring into space with a contemplative look at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...
About Last Night
The joke is on the leopard ... he got off at the wrong stop ... • It was awfully nice of the Lakers to allow the Celtics to win the NBA title at home. (NOTE: Should LA come back and win this, this post never happened. Got it?). • MLB: Yankees beat Astros 13-0, and you can make your own damned Wang j...
NBA Finals Game 5 Second Half Live Blog
Either Pau Gasol is fired up or is auditioning for the role of General Zod in the upcoming feature, Superman IX: Invasion Of the Cassell Clones. But despite a three-point lead for LA, it doesn't look good for them. Hell, even David Spade is pissed. Will the series end tonight? Or will I be tempted t...
NBA Finals Game 5 First Half Live Blog
Whoa, sensei. The NBA Finals Game 5 gets to follow that. Much like when Tiger Woods was on the ropes, so are the LA Lakers, down 3-1 in the series. Kobe Bryant says the series is far from over. Boston would like very much to finish this series right now. The referees were instructed by their superio...
Today We Honor All Middle-Aged Slightly Tubby Guys ... And Tiger Of Course
You know, you have to feel for Rocco Mediate. The guy staves off Tiger Woods all day, the best player in the world on his tail, a 46-year-old man playing the tournament of his life, and his reward is to go 18 more holes tomorrow against the guy. The goal should be survival at this point....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while shopping for cheap airfare to Bulgaria, Copenhagen and Stockholm... • In Progress — Coverage of Tiger Woods winning the U.S. Open [NBC] • 5 p.m. — Soccer: Barbados at U.S.A. Fear the ragin' Bajans. [ESPN2] • 7 p.m. — College World Series: LSU vs. North Carolina. Where can you see...
If I May Talk About The Non-Golf Tigers For A Second
So it took until the middle of June for the Tigers to win five games in a row, and it just happened when most of the fans were on the precipice of giving up on the team. There were even trade rumors surrounding Magglio Ordoñez — a thought which is a mere two degrees less blasphemous than heliocentri...
Cheering Against Tiger Is Like Saying ... Someone ... Was A Victim
• Beyond the magical back nine yesterday, there are tons of reasons to root for Tiger Woods today. [The Arena] • Why it sucks to have the same name as an unpopular referee. [FanIQ] • All kidding aside, I'm quite sure Pat Riley has contemplated this. [The Howeva Files] • When will LaDainian Tomlinson...
Obligatory (And Quick!) Father's Day Post
Possibly one of the most endearing father-son moments in a movie — except for maybe the scene in Space Jam when the doctor says that DNA test reveals Michael Jordan is in fact Bugs Bunny's father — is the Field of Dreams "Dad, you want to have a catch?" scene. It also marks one of the last times we ...
Celtics Fans Are No Longer Hitler Sympathizers
The first line of Jemele HIll's ESPN.com article showed promise: "I thought it wouldn't bother me. I thought I would be OK. Turns out, I was as wrong as Skip Bayless." But somewhere down the line, she lost her way. A reader tipped us off that in Hill's anti-Celtics screed, she used a line that liken...
Brandon Marshall Isn't Ready To Wipe With His Right Hand Yet
You might recall when Denver Broncos wide receiver Brandon Marshall said back in March that he hurt his arm slipping on a McDonald's bag. That turned out to be a fib; he was just roughhousing with some family members and accidentally put his hand through a TV screen. But now it's June and he looks a...
Paul Pierce Is One DUI Away From Becoming Carmelo Anthony
Come on. It's the NBA Finals. Only two teams should be relevant at this point. And since you can't walk three steps without sniffing the history of the Lakers-Celtics rivalry, you'd hope that someone would talk a little jive toward the other. It probably wouldn't be sportsmanlike, but it's definitel...
Presenting Dr. Joe Morgan's Players Of The Day
Caught up in all the hysteria this weekend was Joe Morgan being awarded an honorary doctorate from California State University-East Bay. Don't be too impressed, because I'm pretty sure one summer those came free with the purchase of an In-N-Out Burger combo of equal or lesser value....
In Case You Forgot Why Tiger Woods Got To Marry A Swedish Model
Like many humans and corporate executives before him, Tiger Woods began his round of golf on Saturday with a double bogey. But unlike everyone else, he finished the back nine with two eagles and a birdie. Only Dick Cheney sets himself up in a better position to shoot more types of bird on a weekend...
About Last Night...
What you missed while shopping for the ten best fictional dads for Fathers Day... • U.S. Open: Tiger Uppercut! The one-and-a-half-kneed wonder leads Lee Westwood by one shot. But will we see the Hundred Hand Slap prevail in the final round? • NCAA Baseball: Stanford scores 11 runs in the 9th to beat...
Gurn Save The Queen
Here in America, you win a major sports championship, and you meet the president. Across the pond, when you stick your head through a horse collar and make a face better than anyone else, you meet the Queen. That line was actually in the original Magna Carta....