i Page 7702 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Your 2008 NFL Schedule Has Arrived
It's here! It's here! And remember, in case you've just become heartsick over the fact that you've glanced over the 17 week schedule and highlighted the appropriate games that may or may not pique your pigskinned interest, ESPN is doing a 2 HOUR special about the NFL's 2008 schedule. Yes, 2 HOURS o...

Facial Hair Helps You Hit
• Manny's magic mustache. [Red Sox Monster] • In (more) praise of the great Stan The Man. [Baseball Legends] • The lower tier of sideline reporters can be downright depressing. [SportsWrap] • The ball will just not get in the hole. [Food Court Lunch] • The NBA MVP race, as seen by "The Wire." [The O...

Alex Smith's Popularity Soaring
Sigh. Oh, The Dirty.com. It's amazing that this crew is getting all of these photos (well, three) of 49ers quarterback Alex Smith sent to them. What did Alex Smith ever do to anybody? Besides, you know, kind of suck?...

Highway Robbery In The NBA
In more than 20 years of following professional basketball, I've never seen anything like this. The Philadelphia 76ers had seemingly beaten the Cleveland Cavaliers 90-89. Time had expired. The Sixers were in their locker room celebrating. But stop the presses! The referees had — after reviewing the ...

Media Approval Ratings: Joe Morgan
Joe Morgan is the perfect example of a guy who has never benefited by a more analytical fan. Before fans began developing their own systems and qualifications, Joe Morgan was the type of guy who could make statements with certainty, and, because it was a lazy Sunday night, we might have let them fly...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

Come For Soaking Wet Cheerleaders, Stay For The Goodwill
First of all, kudos to the guy seated at the table on the right; watching cheerleaders plunge into a swimming pool while wearing a comical top hat is pretty much why we all went to college. And, hold it ... the cheerleader in the back there; that pose looks strikingly familiar. Yes, I thought so! ...

The Pope Should Wipe His Feet Before Entering Yankee Stadium
The Pope turns 81 years old today — 10 years older than John McCain, and just three years older than Julio Franco — and he's celebrating it in Washington, D.C. with President Bush. (What better way?) He will be celebrating mass at the new Nationals Stadium, which means we're going to assume Elijah D...

Ortiz Slump Officially Over. Thanks, Yankees!
Here's the thing, Yankees fans. You may have thought that you were heading off some sort of curse by digging up that David Ortiz jersey that was buried beneath your new stadium. But consider this: While the jersey remained buried, it's owner was hitting .070; last in the majors. In his first game ba...

He Is The Dungeon Master. His Rules
The NHL Closer is written by Melt Your Face Off....

The NBA Playoff Guest List Is Ready. Guess Who's Not Invited?
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who don't want to work. He just want to bang on the drum all day. When he's not quoting obscure 80s lyrics, you can find him watching old episodes of The Smurfs at Basketbawful. Enjoy! Psyche! Part I. The game was over. The Sixers had won. In fact, the team...

About Last Night
What you missed while trying to remember the combination to your pants ... • College basketball: Michael Beasley, whose Kansas State team lost six of its last nine games and failed to make it past the second round of the NCAA Tournament, says it's time to "take my game to the next level," enters NBA...

Meet All The Herschel Walkers Tonight
Tonight, ABC's Nightline has an interview with former running back Herschel Walker about his battle with multiple-personality disorder. We find out that Herschel went so some very spooky places while in the throes of his disease, like suicidal thoughts and unpredictable violent urges. Walker's ex-wi...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch with your new friend, Mr. Happy Toilet ... • Arena Football League: Chicago at Kansas City (8:30 p.m., ET). Here's hoping for plenty of air-time for the Brigade Girls. [ESPN2] • MLB: Boston at Cleveland (7 p.m., ET). Hopefully it will be above 12 degrees. [ESPN] • NHL: Western Conferen...

The Cowboys Have A Preferred Long Distance Provider
They're still constructing the Dallas Cowboys' new stadium, and if you're one of those people who thought the Cowboys were too iconic a franchise to fall prey to stadium naming right, well, stop being so foolish....

Can You Outeat Journalism's Top Professionals?
We haven't been to McAfee Coliseum this year — and judging by the attendance figures, few of you have either — but much ado has been made about the upper deck's All You Can Eat package, which is $35, not counting medical bills. How much could you eat?...

Wade Boggs And His Mullet Appear On ESPN
For those of you who saw Wade Boggs on "Baseball Tonight" this weekend — the one ESPN show we never, ever miss — you are probably wondering the same thing The Sports Hernia was wondering: When's "Road House 3" coming out?...

Ron Artest's Lunacy Knows No Bounds
The life of an NBA entourage member is a hard one. Even though it may offer an otherwise unemployable sect of society the opportunity to live an exciting, fulfilling life vicariously through a pampered professional athlete, there is legitimate "work" to be done in order to maintain a prime spot in ...

Scott Spiezio Continues To Drown In Boozy River Of Sadness
Former major leaguer Scott Spiezio's tumultuous battle with alcoholism has been marred by some ugly incidents. But even though the 35-year-old Spiezio had some extremely heavy baggage, the Atlanta Braves took a flyer on the guy, hoping he could get his life together and earn a spot on the Braves ros...

Rejected Commenter Theater 3: The Rejeckoning
To keep the comments as fresh and outstanding as they've been up to this point, we've commissioned Commenting Guru Rob Iracane, co-editor of Walk Off Walk, to write a bi-weekly Comment Ombudsman column. It runs every other week. This is that week....