i Page 7717 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Tao Of Fred Ex
For those of you saw the sleazy, magazine-licking photos of George Clooney's girlfriend Sarah Larson circulating around the web over the last few days, you may have noticed this picture of former Eagles wideout (and substitute teacher) Freddie Mitchell randomly popping up.in the photo book from that...

Eric Gagne, A Still Life
Perhaps our favorite ridiculous conspiracy theory about the Mitchell Report was that Sen. Mitchell, a Red Sox fan, was somehow attempting to stack the deck by ignoring potential Red Sox juicers. Not just that, but he happened to nail the one guy Sox fans hated the most at the time: Eric Gagne. Well,...

She Has Yadier's Ass and Bengie's Hips
Are you a moderately attractive female baseball fan who loves her pink jersey, but dreams of a newer, sluttier look for your drunken summer afternoons in the bleachers? If so, then you should probably send me pictures of yourself in various stages of undress take note of Joe Sports Fan's rather bod...

Obviously, Tom Gordon Didn't Get His Balls Blessed
Yesterday morning, right in front of the Mike Schmidt statue at Citizens Bank Park, the Philadelphia Phillies had their balls blessed by a priest, a rabbi and a pastor with the hopes of giving 2007's team to beat an extra boost of godliness to kick off 2008. Well, God was napping yesterday, as the P...

Congratulations, Sigh, To Bill Self
In the midst of all the sadness about Davidson coming up just short on Saturday, we didn't get a chance to, begrudgingly, congratulate Bill Self and his toupee on their first trip to the Final Four....

Meet The Future Mrs. Andy Roddick
This little lassie just got herself engaged to Andy Roddick (the one on the left.) Her name is Brooklyn Decker, a 20-year-old Sports Illustrated swimsuit exhibitionist, who's been dating Mr. Roddick for a little over a year now. Decker and the former Mr. Mandy Moore met in New York last year, where ...

Hugh Douglas Wants To Kill Me
Being a sports reporter is, at times, an absolutely horrible job. Sure you get to watch games, travel, and interact with athletes, but there is a horrendous downside. (Which is pretty much everything else.) And this is never more disturbingly clear than when a reporter has their first (or 50th ) awf...

Who Owns WHIP? We May Find Out Soon
• They're still trying to figure out who owns fantasy baseball statistics. [Personal Injury Attorney Blog] • Somebody's predictions are gonna be WAY off. [Vegas Watch] • A dissenting voice on the new Nationals stadium. [The Edge Of Sports] • A UCLA guy unfairly (and amusingly) goes after John Calipa...

Which Golden Boy Will Get Wooden?
Storming The Floor looks at the Wooden Award ... if they dare!...

Media Approval Ratings: John Buccigross
We've noticed an awful lot of John Buccigross on "SportsCenter" lately, and that's probably a testament to his abilities to maneuver over there. He somehow escaped hockey jail....

Red Sox Fans, Spread Among The 100,000. What Could Go Wrong?
We really wish we would have attended the Red Sox-Dodgers exhibition game at the Coliseum last weekend, if just because a fight was inevitable....

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

Finding Harry Pujols
OK Brian Suksomwong, you've got some competition. Meet Harry Pujols — he's Albert's cousin — who is a graphic artist from San Francisco. OK, OK, simmer down, class. It's not nice to make fun of people's names. Although, Harry chose to call himself that; he could have gone with Harold but didn't....

People Who Aren't Allowed To Touch Stanley This Year
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....

Not Much Worse Than An Opening Day Rainout
While at the Cardinals bar yesterday for Opening Day — the one from the book — we sat through an hour-and-a-half Cardinals rain delay just to hear that a 5-1 third-inning lead had been wiped out. The Cardinals aren't going to have many four runs leads this year. So losing one yesterday was unpleasan...


It's April Fools In The NBA, Starring The Western Conference Playoff Race
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who just crumpled up his "Western Conference Playoff Position" spreadsheet and ate it. When he's not trying to make heads or tails of this crazy playoff race, you can find him running suicides at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...

Cubs Still Somehow Manage To Fukudome Themselves
It all looked good for the Cubs, thanks to the mighty bat of Kosuke Fukudome, who went 3-for-3 with the game-tying home run off the hairy useless mess that now inhabits former lights-out closer Eric Gagne. But the Cubs still lost to the Milwaukee Brewers 4-3 in 10 innings. Bobby Howry gave up a sacr...