ill Page 677 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Media Approval Ratings: Bill Raftery
We think it's kind of amazing that ESPN has Bill Raftery working with Jay Bilas this week at the Big East tournament. That's not because we don't like either of them; far from it. It's just that Bilas, as a game broadcaster, seems to be doing a Bill Raftery impersonation. Which is fine, of course....
Billy Crystal Signs With Yankees; Red Sox Counter With Wilford Brimley
If I were a Yankees' fan, I'd be really worried right now. Their season is beginning to shape up like a failing TV sitcom; the kind in which they try to bolster sagging ratings by bringing in celebrities for guest appearances. With that in mind, please welcome Billy Crystal, who will play in a sprin...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after fooling soccer players into thinking you starred in Ghost Rider ... • Arena Football League: Los Angeles at Arizona (11 p.m., ET). The only pro football team in Los Angeles would appreciate your support. [ESPN2] • College men's basketball: Colonial Athletic Association championsh...
Cheer, Cheer For Old William And Mary
Anyone who remembers George Mason's amazing run to the Final Four a couple of years ago might find it difficult to cheer against them, but if there's ever a time to, tonight's the night. Because at 7 p.m., their opponent in the CAA Championship Game is William & Mary. And that's amazing....
Sign The Man Up To Play Third Base
Of all the teams whose spring trainings John Daly might visit, we have to say, it makes a certain amount of sense that he would drop by Phillies camp. As Bugs & Cranks points out, he doesn't look that much different than John Kruk, circa 1993....
Man's Ashes Have More Fun Than He Ever Did
Dear tiny infant Jesus, or as our brothers in the south call you, "Jezus," please welcome Big George Helms (pictured here) into your Heavenly kingdom. But first, kindly bear with us as his remains take a couple of laps at Las Vegas Motor Speedway. Then its over to the KFC drive-thru, and then straig...
Nashville Is Really Ruining Things For The Rest Of Us
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
This Is What It Sounds Like When A Franchise Dies
We missed Bill Simmons' impassioned work for Sonics fans while we were on vacation, but it's really pretty excellent stuff, and exactly what a national sports columnist should be doing with his platform. Not that anyone will notice, or do anything, or care....
The Best Sporting Event You've Ever Ignored
You might have missed it over the weekend (what with all the Grapefruit League action), but Israel Vázquez and Rafael Márquez got together for the rubber-match of their epic trilogy and the result was nothing short of astounding. Boxing fans everywhere settled in on Saturday night for what we knew w...
Michael Turner Is Free To Be Mediocre
Erstwhile Chargers running back Michael Turner, best known to fantasy players as the guy you picked up in a late round in hopes that LaDainian Tomlinson would get injured (BUT NNNOOOOOO HE HAD TO WAIT FOR THE PLAYOFFS FOR THAT), got on the 6-year-deal train which seems so popular this off-season and...
Happy Leap Day, Everyone!
So does today actually exist or not? After watching Lost last night, I'm more confused than ever ... and this article is no help. Anyway, on the off chance that today really does exist, I'll be posting a full day's worth of sports outtakes, bloopers and practical jokes. Will is still on vacation, so...
Bill Walton, Will Ferrell Are Superbad
Here's Will Ferrell playing Bill Walton in a game of horse ... a sentence I never thought I'd ever type. As Dogs That Chase Cars says, Ferrell actually shoots the rock pretty damn well. And Walton looks at home in that uniform, doesn't he? (Sarcasm: The anti-drug)....
Bill Belichick Knows Where Lesbians Love
At long last, a prominent pro sports coach has come out of the closet in a nationally- ... wait, what? Sorry. Scratch that. While Bill Belichick is the cover boy for this month's issue of Boston Spirit, the city's premier gay magazine, the mag's publisher points out that his photo was just picked mo...
Uncle Joey Is Babysitting Today
Imagine my surprise when I got in this morning and found this note: On vacation. You're doing the site for the next two days. Do not try to contact me. Beer in the fridge. — Will. A sudden chill ran through me, for I knew instantly what the implications were: There was in fact no beer in the fridge....
When You're Too Slow To Avoid The Zamboni
No, don't worry: A Pittsburgh Penguin did not get crushed on the ice. It's just what happens when a Zamboni's transmission fails, as reported by reader War Penguin, who was on the scene in Pittsburgh in its game against the San Jose Sharks. More action photos after the jump....
Cleveland Fans Rejoice, Suns Fans Weep. For Today, Anyway.
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who blah, blah, blah-diddy-blah. Who cares, right? When he's not forcing you to read useless factoids about himself, he's doing it to a completely different set of readers at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • Shaq has done the impossible. In only three short games, Th...
Media Approval Ratings: Billy Packer
We're getting awfully darned close now to the NCAA tournament business, which means one thing: The return of Billy Packer as the central force in our lives for a month. We know, we know, he broadcasts games throughout the regular season, but it's not until the Tournament that he takes over the voice...
Phoenix Suns Reveal First Attempts To Clone Shaq
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who would use the power of Mighty Science to clone the pet turtle who died when he was 12, and probably Lynda Carter. When he's not fantasizing about a harem of Wonder Woman clones, he can be found manipulating DNA at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • You know, it's a...