ill Page 687 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Matt Simms Can Roll A Fat One (In A Slightly Different Fashion Than His Brother Can)
You might not have realized that Phil Simms actually has two football playing sons. The first is Chris Simms, of course, who was John Amaechi before it was COOL to be John Amaechi. But the second is Matt Simms, who is about to attend Louisville and has proven to be a bit of an asshead....
Blythe: Billy Packer's Greatest Moment
We are quite honored today to welcome once again Will Blythe, the former literary editor of Esquire and author of the great book "To Hate Like This Is To Be Happy Forever", to the warm embrace of Deadspin. (We interviewed Blythe about the book when it came out in hardcover. The paperback is out now....
Blythe: A Creepy Feeling In Chapel Hill
We are quite honored today to welcome Will Blythe, the former literary editor of Esquire and author of the great book "To Hate Like This Is To Be Happy Forever", to the warm embrace of Deadspin. (We interviewed Blythe about the book when it came out in hardcover. The paperback is out now....
Ron Zook Will Turn Your Conventional Wisdom Upside Down
Our beloved alma mater, the University of Illinois, is having a mediocre year in basketball and has won, like, four games in two years, even forcing us to sit through a 33-0 loss to Rutgers last year that mostly resembled a cock fight between a rabid rooster and an egg. But worry not, fellow alums: ...
Bill Cowher Surprisingly Cool When You Accost Him On The Beach With A Video Camera
Via Sports By Brooks, here's a video apparently shot in February 2000 from an incredibly rude (but amusingly inquisitive) fan who ran into Bill Cowher and his wife on an undisclosed tropical locale....
Cole Hamels Likes The Scrawny Reality TV Stars
For those of you who watch "Survivor," you might remember Heidi Strobel, a woman who, after three weeks on an island with little food, proved herself to be 85 percent breasts....
Ted Johnson Would Like You To Remind Him Where He Put His Keys ... And His Pants
Wasn't it just a couple of years ago that Bill Belichick was God? Lose a couple of big games, and it all begins to crumble. Former Patriots linebacker Ted Johnson said on Thursday that Belichick forced him to practice with a concussion, causing him to, um, to ... what was it were were talking about?...
The Last Days Of ESPN2
See that logo right there? Cute, isn't it? Sure is: ESPN2, all grown up from espn2, back in the days when Keith Olbermann wore skinny ties and anchors weren't afraid to toss in a "dude" or "rad" from time to time....
Billy Joel Hopefully Sober For National Anthem
So here's something we hadn't realized: Billy Joel is singing the national anthem at the Super Bowl. Though we are impressed that the NFL remains current and cutting edge with their selection of everyone's favorite rapidly decaying crooner, we are also curious about just how long it's gonna take him...
Shaq Keeps The World Safe, One Escalade At A Time
It is clear, at this point, that in his dreams Shaquille O'Neal flies over our major cities, combing the streets and alleys from up high, looking for evildoers to apprehend and, if necessary, kung fu chop. Sunday morning, after Shaq had returned from a game in Chicago, he and his bodyguard — whom we...
Serena Rampages Through Australia
Playing like a slightly more masculine version of Roger Federer, Serena Williams spanked Maria Sharapova in the finals of the Australian Open yesterday, winning 6-1, 6-2. It is the third biggest upset in Australian Open history, sort of. Serena came into the tournament ranked 81st in the world. Turn...
William Perry, Keeping Busy (And Incognito!)
In case you were wondering what William "The Refrigerator" Perry was up to these days, now that the offers to box Manute Bol have dried up, here's one of his main promotional opportunities: Big Camo, "the world's BEST outlet for HARD or IMPOSSIBLE to find BIG and TALL camouflage hunting clothes, acc...
That's All We Need: ANOTHER Blowhard In DC
So here's a scary thought. If you thought Curt Schilling had a tendency to opine, uninvited, on subjects that don't inherently concern him now, wait until he runs for Senate....
Bobby Knight Unlocks Another Mystery
Bobby Knight sure has been chatty since breaking the all-time NCAA men's win mark. Here's his take on the whole Bill Parcells situation in Dallas. Parcells, a longtime friend of Knight's since their coaching days at Army, resigned earlier this week. The reason? It's all because of Terrell Owens, of ...
Deadspin Field Trip: Our Battle With Slash And Bad Moon
Last year around this time, thanks to a promotion for that "Pros Vs. Joes" show on Spike that no one we know watches, we strapped on a helmet and batted against John Rocker. That trip worked out so well for everybody that they asked us if we'd be interested in heading to Grand Central Station in New...
Hey, Everyone! How Ya Hoofing?
On the day that Barbaro gets another good report card from his vet, we check in with the Barbaro Message Board to find that, well, things are getting just plain weird. And when you're talking about the Barbaro Message Board, that's saying something....
Dick Vitale's Attention Deficit Disorder
Some jobs in the world have to be considered a labor of hate; it's a ton of work, it drives you crazy, it's miserable ... but it's existence makes the world a better place....
Parcells Says That'll Be Enough, Thank You
The Dallas Cowboys blog just reported the news: Bill Parcells has retired as coach of the Cowboys....
The First Rule Of Pillow Fight Club: Do Not Talk About Pillow Fight Club
"Pillow fights were different in my day," said the old man, his wrinkled features revealing the memories. "We didn't have these modern synthetic pillows, or neck pillows with lumbar back support. We used the real thing, with feathers! Yeah, sometimes they'd bust open. But that was the chance you too...
Who Dare Oppose The Flailing Fists Of Fury?
Ah, the windmill. Once a devastating fighting maneuver featured in middle schools everywhere, it has fallen out of favor in recent years, and is now nearly extinct in the wild. The only place one can see it currently is in Popeye cartoons or Spanish soccer, the latter which recently gave us the some...