it Page 1541 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Everyone Had A Good Time At Ted Ginn's Birthday Riot
Cleveland police had to break up a "near riot" in front of the House of Blues last night, that ended with Buffalo Bills defensive back Donte Whitner on the wrong end of a taser....

Slur-Filled Rant Saves America From Terrible Reality Show
UFC president Dana White's anti-"stupid bitch" rant may have cost him a reality show, probably because the producers were angry that he didn't save his best unhinged raging for their cameras. [Brooks]...

Time To Get Your Chicago Pants Party Tickets
The final deadline to purchase tickets for Deadspin's Chicago Pants Party on May 23 is next Friday. If you've been procrastinating, it's time to buy. Follow the link for details and tickets. [Pants Party Details]...

Women, Children Frightened By Giant Hamburger
The official unveiling of the West Michigan Whitecaps' immense 5,000-calorie Fifth Third Burger on Thursday stirred up a variety of emotions, but the following quote is by far my favorite:...

Down In Front, Regis! Celebrity Fans And Why We Hate Them
It's Waxing Off, the Internet feature that was planted in the ground by God to test our faith. This week's topic: The scourge of celebrity sports fans....

Your Team Is A Fan Of Being On Probation
Please don't take any "What cast member of 'Saved By The Bell' is your 4-star basketball recruit?" quizzes on Facebook, unless you want your program to get slapped with an NCAA violation for being dumb....

Well, That's One Way To Fire Your Trainer
Miguel Cotto's split with his uncle/manager Evangelista Cotto on Wednesday was completely peaceful, except for the ugly brawl and the cinder block through the window of his new jaguar....

Savor This Moment, Because It May Never Happen Again
It's rare that one can say this and mean it, so one must make it count: Yesterday's victory over the White Sox gave the Kansas City Royals sole possession of first place in the AL Central....

He Obviously Ate The Cheez Doodles First
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

This Is Why The Internet Wins
In a day inundated with depressing news, it only seems fitting to end it with mindless insanity courtesy of Mr. Ufford at Warming Glow. This is your reward for being respectful today....

High School Basketball Without The High Schools
Sports Illustrated has a very curious story this week about Findlay Prep, the team that won ESPN's inaugrual RISE National High School Invitational tournament last weekend. There's just one issue—Findlay Prep is not a high school....

Nooooooooooo!
Well this is just sad. A Canadian sporting event without beer is just, well, it's sparsely attended, for starters. Poor hosers....

UNC Student Burned But Proud
As we learned in Lord of the Flies, dancing near bonfires often leads to the collapse of the social structure, and on occasion a trip to the North Carolina Jaycee Burn Center....

This Is How Skip Bayless Keeps His Mouth In Shape
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Barry Zito Uses Twitter To Talk About His New Kitchen Appliances
"It's cold in my room, but my Dutch oven warms me up..." [Pacman Jonesin']...

Here's Your 'Man Streaks Little League Game' Story For Today
Port St. Lucie (Fla.) police are looking for a man who sped naked across the outfield at a youth baseball game on Thursday. Yeah, might as well set your sights high, dude....

Do Not Cross The Hillsdale College Baseball Team
In a tradition as old as baseball itself, an editor who criticized the Hillsdale College (Mich.) baseball team's putrid record found his front porch decorated with dead animal carcasses, including a shotgunned goat....

Ted Kennedy Still Looked Better Than Lincecum
"Thank God this isn't Deadspin, or the comments would be loaded with 1.3 retarded Massholes typing "GO SOX!!1!!!@!!!" [Wonkette]...

Lions Take Stafford At No. 1. Rams, You Are Now On The Clock
At least that's what Pro Football Talk is reporting, with the caveat that interest in the Georgia QB may just be a clever smokescreen (ha ha, but anyway ...). [Pro Football Talk]...

Tank Johnson Is Obviously Confident That He's A Changed Man
The former Bear/Cowboy/convict has just signed a one year deal with...the Cincinnati Bengals. [ESPN]...