kings Page 36 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Sacramento Kings Are, Uh, Fine? Maybe?
Okay, so, here we are, eight games into the NBA season, and the Sacramento Kings are 5-3. Sure, it’s early, and sure, the Kings have had decent starts before only to collapse into piles of shit. All the usual caveats apply, and the Kings could very easily turn back into a pumpkin when the clock stri...
Whoa, Hey, Some Football Players Got Traded
The NFL stove is notoriously ice fucking cold throughout the regular season, but teams have been feisty over the last few days, and some big-name players have been traded for significant draft picks. The league trade deadline passed at 4:00 p.m. EDT today, and would you believe it, some more guys go...
Bleacher Report Accidentally Owns Ice Cream Shop Harry Giles Is Supposed To Like
Bleacher Report published a profile of Sacramento Kings center Harry Giles that opened with the most hackneyed profile technique of all time: the subject eating. This particular eating scene, however, also included 300 words of what amounted to a kind of press release about the company that makes th...
Everson Griffen Back With The Vikings After Mental Health Evaluation: "I'm Taking It One Day At A Time"
Five weeks after Minnesota Vikings defensive lineman Everson Griffen jumped out of an ambulance on the way to a mental-health evaluation following weeks of erratic behavior that included threatening to shoot someone at a hotel in Minneapolis, he is back with the team, and addressed reporters after p...
Giants Trade Damon Harrison, Prepare For Long Winter Of Tanking
The NFL trade market has been unusually active in the days leading up to this year’s deadline, thanks in large part to the willingness of the crap-ass Raiders and Giants to spend the rest of the season tanking. The Giants began their march to the toilet yesterday when they traded cornerback Eli Appl...
The Sacramento Kings Are Going To Be Apocalyptically Bad, But Harry Giles Will Be Fun
Another season of Sacramento Kings basketball is upon us, and you will not be surprised to learn that Year 13 of the rebuild will be yet another futile one....
Despite Evidence To The Contrary, Adam Thielen Insists His Touchdown Dance Is Cool
The dance isn’t the Bernie. Even though it very much looks like the Bernie, and there’s no significant difference between it and the Bernie, Adam Thielen’s touchdown dance is not the Bernie. The Vikings receiver wants to get that straight....
Report: The Raiders Are Ready To Start Blowing It Up
The Oakland Raiders have been a disaster this season, which should surprise nobody, since they spent the offseason backing up the Brinks truck for washed-up geezer Jon Gruden, trading the best defensive player in the NFL, and completing the saddest player transaction of the summer. Their lone win th...
What Can We Learn From Four Stadium Deals That Don't Suck?
Whenever professional economists are asked about stadium and arena deals, they invariably explain, for the hundredth time, that these “almost never” work out to the benefit of the public. (Look, here are a bunch saying so just a few weeks ago!) Between the price tags in the hundreds of millions of d...
Ilya Kovalchuk Is Back And He Doesn't Look Half Bad
The L.A. Kings picked up their first win of this young season by defeating the Red Wings 4-2 on Sunday night. Back-up goalie Jack Campbell deserves plenty of the credit for those two points by holding strong for 36 saves in an emergency start, but perhaps the most encouraging work of the night came ...
Dubious Roughing Call On Michael Bennett Sets Up Vikings Touchdown
The Eagles went into halftime of their game agains the Vikings down 17-3, thanks in part to a roughing the passer penalty that prevented the Vikings from facing a third-and-long and set them up to score a touchdown right before the half....
Linval Joseph Scores Ultimate Fat Man Touchdown
Fat man touchdowns are one of the few remaining things about football that can bring me pure, unadulterated joy in a moment’s notice. Vikings defensive tackle Linval Joseph is the latest large lad to bring me such happiness. On a 1st-and-10 passing play, Stephen Weatherly was able to strip-sack Cars...
Brandon Ingram Electrifies Lakers Crowd With Uh Inbounds Defense, No Really
This should not be interpreted as proof that Brandon Ingram is Good now. He had a promising sophomore season; he’s got some defensive versatility; he’s a terror when pointed at the cup and on the move. These things will sort themselves out in the regular season. Certainly a preseason game against th...
Are The NHL's Mini-Dynasties Dead?
Until the Capitals broke through to win their first Cup, the Penguins, Blackhawks, and Kings dominated the NHL as the most effective triumvirate since Roman times. Instead of ending with stabbings and civil war, the modern NHL version collapsed for more mundane reasons involving salary caps and agin...
Badass Vikings Long Snapper Returns To Play After Losing Tip Of Pinky Finger Mid-Game
It will probably not become part of NFL lore the way Ronnie Lott’s finger amputation did, but it’s certainly very, very gross: Vikings long snapper Kevin McDermott “lost the tip of his pinky” during Minnesota’s loss Thursday night to the all-powerful Rams, but somehow continued playing:...
Adam Thielen Blows Up Over Medical Timeout, Passes Concussion Protocol, Scores Touchdown
Adam Thielen got pretty well smashed on an incomplete pass from Kirk Cousins in the third quarter of Thursday night’s Vikings-Rams game. Thielen had the ball, but Cory Littleton’s forearm and then Cory Littleton’s knee crashed into Thielen’s head and jarred the ball loose, and Thielen seemed like he...
I Too Am All Fucked Up By These Dang Card Tricks
The Sacramento Kings invited magician Anna DeGuzman to media day this week to destroy the minds of various unsuspecting players. Friends, the tricks are good....
Police Report: Vikings' Everson Griffen Jumped Out Of An Ambulance On His Way To Mental Health Evaluation
Just two days after the Minnesota Vikings told defensive lineman Everson Griffen that he would not be allowed at practice until he received a mental health evaluation, Griffen was transported to a mental health facility after he threatened to shoot someone at a hotel in Minneapolis and was acting er...