lina Page 74 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Sometimes You Have To Shove The Trombone Player So You Can Kick
Sure, it’s inconvenient when you want to kick and you’re hemmed in by some big stupid marching band. But on the other hand, do you know a better way to simulate kicking in the midst of an onrushing defense?...
A Kevin Sumlin Offense Is A Thing Of Alarming Beauty
Football is back. You can tell because Kevin Sumlin is wrecking shit....
Welcome To The Gradual Unfucking Of College Football
Every year, right around this time, I cobble together a Hater's Guide to the Top 25 teams in college football. And it contains pretty much everything you would expect in any boilerplate piece of college football trolling: Notre Dame is full of haughty dipshits; Alabama fans are crazy redneck muta...
UNC Suspends Four Players After Report Of Alleged Hazing Investigation
North Carolina has suspended four players—starting cornerbacks Desmond Lawrence and Brian Walker and backups M.J. Stewart and Donnie Miles—after it was revealed the school is investigating an alleged hazing incident that left walk-on freshman wideout Jackson Boyer with a concussion. ...
Cam Newton Has Fractured Rib, Is Questionable For Week 1
An MRI exam yesterday revealed a hairline fracture in one of Panthers QB Cam Newton's ribs, putting him out next weeks' final preseason tune-up, and putting his availability for the start of the regular season in question....
The Perfect Imperfect Couple: <em>Love Is Strange</em>, Reviewed
Leo Tolstoy's line "Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way" could be applied to romantic relationships as well—especially if you're not in a good one. From the outside, a happy marriage can look like an aberration, a fluke, or just dumb luck. Because so muc...
Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Carolina Panthers
Some people are fans of the Carolina Panthers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Carolina Panthers. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Jose Molina's Home-Run Trot Was So Slow, A Teammate Almost Passed Him
Jose Molina, the only currently active, uninjured Molina brother, is 39 years old. So, we don't expect him to get around the bases quickly. But teammate Kevin Kiermaier almost passed him on the basepaths after hitting a two-run homer against the Athletics today....
What About The Maturation Of Peter King?
The first item in Peter King's latest MMQB column is about Panthers quarterback Cam Newton and "maturation." Specifically, it is about how one of the NFL's most important figures refuses to set aside childish things and instead wallows in a state of doltish adolescence. When, the reader is left to...
South Carolina Gamecocks Self-Report Rule-Breaking Cookie Cakes To NCAA
The latest example of unnecessary self-flagellation for the NCAA's satisfaction comes from South Carolina. The Gamecocks reported 22 minor violations of NCAA rules, and the dumbest by far involves the football team and cookie cakes....
Patriots Screw Panthers, Claim Their Sixth-Round Rookie Running Back
Panthers running back Tyler Gaffney injured his left meniscus last Friday, so his rookie season's already done. Normally, Carolina would place him on injured reserve, but because teams still have 90-man rosters at this point of the season, injured players have to clear waivers before they can be shi...
Yadier Molina Leaves Crackers For Brother Jose On Home Plate
Is this the source of the Molina catching prowess? Crackers? ...
Never Change, OBC
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Two-Tone Foreheads Are Back In Style
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Greg Hardy's Girlfriend Testifies: "I Was So Scared I Wanted To Die"
Panthers defensive end Greg Hardy was in court today for allegedly beating his girlfriend Nicole Holder and threatening to shoot her in May. Holder initially wasn't present, but arrived in time to give her testimony....
Brewers Catcher Jonathan Lucroy's Anti-Cardinals All-Star Ad Is Perfect
Milwaukee Brewers catcher Jonathan Lucroy's making a push to get voted into this season's All-Star Game, and his anti-Yadier Molina, anti-Cardinals message features the kind of mudslinging one could only find in a local political ad....
Rashad McCants Made The Dean's List At UNC Without Attending Classes
Rashad McCants, who starred on the 2005 North Carolina championship team, comes clean about his experience at UNC—and says academics could hardly have been more of a sham. He claims he skipped classes, had his papers written for him, and that Roy Williams and the athletic department "100 percent" kn...
The <em>Sleeping Beauty</em> Reboot You Never Wanted: <em>Maleficent</em>, Reviewed.
Back in 2006, Patton Oswalt had a standup bit where he fantasized about going back in time and killing George Lucas so he'd never make the Star Wars prequels. In the imaginary conversation, Lucas tries to sell Oswalt on those reviled films by assuring the comedian that all the things he digs about t...
Lasagna Disaster Inspires Incredible Headline
Yes, that is a real front page, from the May 16 edition of the Gaffney Ledger in South Carolina. Note that the headline isn't a quote, but an editorial decision to use "LASAGNA WAS EVERYWHERE" in huge font above the fold. The full story describes the high-octane lasagna accident in necessary detail....