ow Page 905 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Today In Great Ledes
"Sports historians will look back on what happened at ESPN's ESPY awards the other night and pinpoint it as the broadcast that signaled the rise of soccer and the death of football." [Chicago Tribune]...

Soccer Analysts Find Many, Many Ways To Call The Japanese Short
On Sunday, the US Women take on Japan in the Women's World Cup Final. It will be a "tall order" for the Japanese, who have a "height disadvantage." Nay, a "major size disadvantage." The "small Japanese" will "lack height" against the Americans. But despite a match pitting "the smaller Japanese again...

Rick Reilly Goes Union-Busting
Rick Reilly popped another reheated turd out of the microwave. It's a variation on his standard deification of golf as the world's most perfect sport. But here's the twist: this time those blue collar heroes of the links are contrasted with the greedy millionaires of the NBA and NFL....

Cubs And Marlins Do Their Best To Out-Lowlight One Another
The Cubs blew a 3 2-0 lead against the Marlins last night in a ninth inning that saw Chicago closer Carlos Marmol booed off the mound by the friendly hometown crowd. The hurt started with this Greg Dobbs hit to right field, which — despite Dewayne Wise's unprovoked face-plant as he headed toward h...

College Football Writer Mike Bruce Feldman Is Persona Non Grata In Bristol
Sports by Brooks is reporting that ESPN college football writer Bruce Feldman "has been banned from writing for any ESPN entity, is forbidden from appearing on any ESPN platform, is not allowed to Tweet from his Twitter account nor participate in any promotion of a recently-released book in which F...

BBC Mistakenly Confuses Media Gadfly For Baseball Expert, Substantial Awkwardness Ensues
Ben Walker writes about baseball for the Associated Press—you'll see his byline, or, perhaps, his words fairly often. Michael Wolff is not Ben Walker. Wolff is a media writer for Vanity Fair, which would never have heard of baseball were Michael Lewis not on its masthead....

Hope Solo Headlines Spring Eternal
Hope Solo and her teammates will play in the Women's World Cup final on Sunday afternoon — largely thanks to Solo's heroics in goal. The worst things to come out of this very exciting thing, though, are the headlines. Here they are, in ascending order of awfulness....

Randy Savage Tribute Show Ends With Crooked Promoter Running Off With The Cash
As oftentimes happens when wrestlers fall ill or pass away, a Florida promoter put together a tribute show for Randy "Macho Man" Savage. These things are always fun: a bunch of old friends and co-workers show up, put on a fun little show in the memory of their buddy, and the gate receipts go to char...

The Seth Meyers-Lynn Hoppes Pre-ESPYs Bro-Down Skewers ESPN
Last we checked in on Page 2's Lynn Hoppes, he was breathlessly name-dropping third-tier celebrities, en route to this whole thing. (Of note: ESPN has since pulled the offending Hoppes video from its YouTube account. Did Brock Lesnar's attorneys complain?) Hoppes is ESPN's expert in the macho-tinged...

Now Playing: The Coldplay-Scored Trailer For Tony Romo's Wedding
The NFL quarterback wedding season is officially upon us, America, and for that, we are thankful — because the quarterbacks in question keep making embarrassing documentation of their weddings available to the general public. First, there was Mr. and Mrs. Flacco in formation, and today, we present...

Ryan Howard's RBI Total Does Not Make Him The Greatest Baseball Player In The Universe, Bill Conlin
Bill Conlin wrote something dumb today. In other news, the sun rose in the east. But we're not going to go after Bill Conlin, because it's been done. Instead we're going to try and put in the simplest terms possible why he and anyone else rejecting advanced statistics out of hand are being willfully...

Stare At Colin Cowherd For A While, For A Good Cause
Here is how we know ESPN hates people with cancer: if you want to donate money to The V Foundation, you're forced to hang out with the likes of Colin Cowherd and Mike & Mike....

This Is Michael Irvin On The Cover Of <em>Out</em> Magazine
There's a fantastic Michael Irvin profile in this month's Out magazine which, given the recent newsworthy items about another particular NFC East wide receiver, will hopefully lead to more progress on the issue. Irvin reveals how in his early Playmaker days, he was just as guilty of stereotyping, ga...

Winner And New Heavyweight Champion Of The World, This Guy's Belly
Your morning roundup for July 12, the day we said goodbye to Stoner Avenue. Photo via BlackSportsOnline....

My 3,000th Hit
Derek Jeter gave me the only baseball I ever got at a game. It was spring training in Tampa, and I was watching the Yankees practice from behind the dugout. Jeter jogged in with a ball, about to give it to the crowd. At first, I started to wave for it, but then, noticing the other 20 similarly aged ...

Presenting The World’s Dick-Suckingest Derek Jeter Column
In a world where every member of the sports media lines up enthusiastically to lap up whatever fluid comes out of Derek Jeter's penis, we now have a new champion when it comes to Jeter's canonization. It comes from Ian O'Connor at ESPN, and it made Ken Tremendous cry. Come take a look at this shit....

Here's Video Of A Ukrainian Goalkeeper Making What Has To Be The Worst Play Of His Career
In Ukrainian Premier League action yesterday, a Volyn Lutsk defender scored from roughly 45 yards out during a match against Kryvbas Krivyi Rih. He did so by passing the ball to his own goalkeeper, Vitaliy Nedilko, who had a difficult time of stopping it before it cost his side a 1-0 loss....

Jose Canseco Knows What He Wants And Is Not Afraid To Ask The World For It
Day Two of the latest Jose Canseco sad-clown meltdown saw him preaching from the mountaintop ("Be careful with woman who show off there tits and ass and think that's a career"), real-talking ("I will never forget or forgive what u said to me leila ur evil"), serving as the phone company's Green Pag...

In His Latest Meltdown, Jose Canseco Decided To Publicize His Girlfriend's Phone Number, Drug Of Choice
What started with Jose Canseco's Thursday announcement that "I am asking leila shennib to marry me .will you marry me" has somehow gone off the rails. Imagine that....

Concussed Cyclist Doesn't Remember Finishing Yesterday's Stage Of The Tour De France
Your morning roundup for July 9, the day Detroit teaches us to respect the crackheads who walk among us....