ow Page 918 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
They Unveiled A Tim Tebow Statue In Gainesville Today
At the University of Florida's annual Orange and Blue spring game, bronze statues were unveiled in honor of the school's three Heisman Trophy winners....
The Dodgers Are Concerned Enough About Fan Violence To Offer Half-Priced Booze At Six Upcoming Games
The Los Angeles Dodgers have talked a good game in returning their stadium to something that doesn't resemble a gangland Thunderdome where opposing fans get beaten into comas for no discernible reason....
Here's Video Of Critics Of The Guy Who Sold The Sonics To Oklahoma City Getting Thrown Out Of A Costco
Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz went to the Costco in Issaquah, Wash. yesterday to autograph copies of his book "Onward: How Starbucks Fought for Its Life Without Losing Its Soul." Fans of the late Seattle SuperSonics found this ironic, since they consider letting their beloved basketball team leave ...
Ryan Braun Did Not Actually Suggest Prince Fielder Is A Threat To Your Bag Of Potato Chips
Our friends at Talking Chop spotted something strange during the Brewers-Braves broadcast Thursday afternoon....
College Kid Who Cried "Coach Attacked Me" Apparently Decided To Steal Two Beers From The Phillies
Your morning roundup for April 8, the day the Associated Press union decided to stick it to The Man, with whom it's negotiating a new contract, by not promoting stories on Facebook and Twitter next week. Consequences will never be the same....
Big Yankees Fan Offers A Rebecca Black Inspired Production Just In Time For the Red Sox Series
Michael Lapayower is very excited about tomorrow's Yankees game against their rivals, the 0-6 Boston Red Sox. Granted, LaPayower gets very excited about every Yankees game. He probably does the same on off days, even those in the offseason, just thinking about the Yankees....
ESPN's Corporate Blog Finds Rock Bottom Somewhere In This Idiot's Office
If you're at all like me, you've avoided ESPN's in-house blog, Front Row, in much the same way you avert your eyes whenever a cat starts licking its own asshole. But this? This is just too much....
Real Men Support The Cleveland Indians By Kissing One Another On Live Television
Your morning roundup for April 7, the day that attempted courtroom eye-gouging became a no-no....
There's A Teenage German Girl Who Rides Cows Like They're Horses
Regina Mayer's parents wouldn't buy her a horse so she went into the family barn, picked out cow and cultivated a loving, respectful relationship. Today, Regina climbs upon Luna's back and engages in a modified version of eventing near the Austrian border....
The Dodgers Seemingly Want Their Fans To Stop Beating People Into Comas
Six days after a San Francisco Giants fan was brutally beaten outside Dodger Stadium, former LAPD Chief William Bratton has been hired to review security at and around the park. Said team owner Frank McCourt, Bratton will "lead a top-to-bottom review of our current practices and make recommendation...
<i>SI's</i> Post-Championship Cover: Recycling A Jim Nantz Pun
Earlier today, we brought you wretched flashbacks from last night, when Jim Nantz, who is usually sharpei if mastiff, deployed the oldest dog-related puns in the bark. It was an announcing boner—the shih tzu see too often on TV. The line stank like poodle the moment we heard it....
The Quirks Of Gambling On Professional Wrestling
Since the dawn of time, it's been mankind's dream to own the Sports Almanac from Back To The Future Part II. If one could know the result of a sporting event beforehand, one could make untold riches by gambling on it. While the Novikov self-consistency principle — or perhaps Calvinism — means this c...
Jim Nantz Predictably Overdoes It With The Dog Puns
To be fair to Worst Man Jim Nantz, we understand that a Huskies-Bulldogs final is a bit like Christmas for him. A Christmas trimmed with multiple opportunities for insufferable references to dogs and winning. And so when the buzzer sounded, Nantz dropped three dog puns in under 20 seconds. It was ...
If A Hockey Writers' Protest Emerges From Long Island, And No One Hears It...
So, as surprising as the thought might be, there is a hockey team playing its games in Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, best known to you as the venue that hosted that awful concert you once had to drag your niece to. That hockey team is the 30-37-12 New York Islanders, which even has a couple spr...
Dennis Rodman Recognizes The Importance Of Family
Your morning roundup for April 2, the day that the color starts returning to the knuckles of passengers and crew on Southwest Flight 812, the plane with a three-foot hole in its side....
Watch "Special Greg" Flip Over His Bike 30 Feet In The Air And Not Die
It is news to us that there was once an MTV series called Nitro Circus, which involved x-treme athlete Travis Pastrana and his friends nearly killing themselves in the name of x-tremity. But it turns out there was, and that some of them still do near-death things in the name of non-nationally-broa...
Timing The Trots For Six Famous Home Runs; Or, Bo Jackson Will Blow Your Mind
As a Brewers fan, it's pretty common to hear from others around the NL Central that no one is worse at watching and admiring his home runs than Prince Fielder and Ryan Braun. And while I can understand where these Cards and Cubs fans are coming from, I don't completely agree. After all, I get to see...
Here's Video Of John Wall Elbow-Punching Zydrunas Ilgauskas In The Ribs Tonight
It's videos like this that make America wish Erik Spoelstra was a little more like Jeff Van Gundy and Zydrunas Ilgauskas emulated Alonzo Mourning. Oh, both Wall and Ilgauskas got thrown out and the Heat won....
Here's Tim Tebow's New Jockey Ad, Kind Of
With apologies to King Herod, we've provided a slight edit to possible NFL starter and definite advertising boon Tim Tebow's brand new Jockey ad. The company released this spot today, and it is somehow even more reverential and vanilla than we ever could have imagined it to be. When Tim Tebow is m...
Ken Rosenthal Will Wear A Bow Tie All Year
We generally appreciate Rosenthal, even if he does on occasion throw some shit at the wall. We're therefore delighted to see he'll be making the bow tie a permanent addition to the wardrobe, at least for this season. And it's for a good cause....