p Page 6500 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
More Top Cheese From Our Favorite Lacrosse Emailer
Perhaps you've seen this amusing email that's been making the rounds, authored by a former college lacrosse player who's looking for a spot on a club team. Well, he's authored another one....
Donte' Stallworth To Be Charged With DUI Manslaughter
The sad tale of Browns' wide receiver Donte Stallworth has reached an unsurprising end, as Miami police are set to charge him with DUI manslaughter for mowing down 59-year-old Mario Reyes....
Who Watches The Umpires?
It's not QuesTec anymore. No, Major League Baseball has an even newer-fangled tool to monitor balls and strikes and I'm sure the league's umpires are just thrilled about it....
Oh, Bill, Don't Interview JoePa Right After He Wakes Up From His Nap
Paterno being interviewed by Bill Raftery at last night's PSU/ND NIT game: "Everyone says it's a black mans game. When I played it was a Jewish mans game." [HHR]...
Boston Guys: This Woman Could Be Your Wife One Day
There's something so calming about this dimwitted lady's Sisyphean trudge up the down-side of the escalator, undeterred by science, or the thousands of annoyed Bruins fans in her path....
Look At That: John Calipari Is At Kentucky
John Calipari is the new coach of the Kentucky Wildcats and he's going right to work. Step One: Managing expectations....
Giant Burger Of Doom Now Comes With A Side Of Controversy
West Michigan Whitecaps are refusing an advocacy group's demand that they put a warning label on their 4,800-calorie super-burger. [NBCSports]...
Oregon Basketball Infected By Cannibalism?
Three Oregon basketball players were cited on Monday for shooting BB guns ... at ducks! That's just sick! [Register-Guard]...
Welcome To The Day Everyone On The Internet Thinks They're A Freakin' Comedian
• Foolish: Andrew Bynum also did very well in the playmate hula hoop competition. Man, why don't I ever get to go to rehab? [Yardbarker]...
Former Gators Have Their Priorities In Order
Former Florida Gator Brent Wright is in a wee bit of trouble with his Croatian League basketball squad for oversleeping and missing an away game. Um, this photo may have something to do with that....
Hasheem Thabeet Would Like You To Know He Failed A Drug Test
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Jim Leyland Really Struggled With This Gary Sheffield Decision
"It's not good when you light up two Marlboro's at the same time at 3 a.m., washing it down with a glass of chocolate milk." Amen.[DetNews]...
Pat Bowlen To Cutler: JUST GO AWAY, YOU STUPID BABY
Actually it was a bit more reasonable than that — but just as emphatic. So which team will snag Jay Cutler? [DenverPost]...
All Your Hopes And Fears Will Be Revealed Once You Open ... "The Door"
The Door is blowing up! It has devotees, worshipers, even its own Facebook fan group. The vigil continues....
Michael Westbrook Is Beating People Up Again
• Wait, he was supposed to do that? The former wideout is somehow a jiu-jitsu master? What's the name of the jiu-jitsu move where you punch a teammate in the back of the head? [D.C.SportsBog]...
And Here's Your Next ETrade Baby Commercial
No collection of videos featuring fans catching balls would be complete without potential baby droppage. [Home Run Derby]...
Tyler Hansbrough, In All His White Doughy Glory
While watching the UNC-Oklahoma game with a friend who knows nothing about college basketball, she suddenly blurted out, "What's wrong with that guy's face? Why won't he close his mouth?"...
It Looks Like Andrew Bynum's Knee Is Just Fine
The Lakers' center played in a golf/Playmate-lifting contest at the Playboy Mansion Saturday, despite not playing an NBA game since January because of a bad knee. To be fair, she is filled with helium. [SI]...
Minor League Team Invites You To Watch A Game FROM A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER
If your lifelong dream has been to watch a minor league baseball game from a 1978 GMC van parked just beyond the outfield near a major river, then you're in luck, my fat motivational-speaking friend....
This Is Why You Will Always Be Horrible, You Bastard Mets
Phillies fan works St. John's/Georgetown game on Sunday is asked to take his Fightins' jacket off. Does he do it? No! He leaves Citi Field instead. Brilliant. [The 700 Level]...