p Page 6599 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
College Football Preview: John Parker Wilson's Cell Phone Belongs to the Cajuns
Alabama's John Parker Wilson is the latest SEC player attempting to overcome the LSU fans snagging his cell phone number and listing it everywhere on the internets. Confounding Cajuns. You'll recall that earlier this season Knowshon Moreno and A.J. Green were the victims. They joined Tim Tebow from...
High School Kids Choose Phillies Over Football
Much like the site you're reading now, there were some attendance problems last Friday in certain Philadelphia area school systems. Reports say that as much as 20 percent of the area's students licked their palms and skipped school so they could be sworn at by Chase Utley. Among that group are nine ...
If They've Named It 'The Cage Of Death,' You Know It's Safe
There are many times in life when you're justified in saying 'I'm not getting in there.' The Raiders' Black Hole immediately comes to mind, as do the restrooms at Ralph Wilson Stadium. And I've also pretty much made it a rule never to allow myself to be submerged amongst enormous, hungry crocodiles;...
Buck Burnette Just Can't Stop Apologizing for Absent-Minded Facebook Racism
After Texas backup center Buck Burnette was kicked off the team for his idiotic Facebook status comment, he issued a sincere apology that, at the very least, proved he knew what he did was wrong. The online contrition tour continues for Burnette, and now he's fired off another apology via Longhorn f...
Marathon Runners Have Trouble Following Directions
In a move that was reminiscent of the lady runner who didn't get a prize despite running the fastest time in a San Francisco marathon, another speed demon was recently disqualified from his race despite running the 26.2 miles faster than anyone else that day. Unlike the school teacher (who eventuall...
Well, They're Back To Square One With The Old Folks Home Flasher Case
Former sprint champion Mark Walcott was cleared on Thursday of charges that he exposed himself five times at two old folks homes in Britain, but at what cost? During the trial it was revealed that Walcott was having affairs with two women at the same time, both of whom were hauled into court to prov...
Quinn's Debut Inspires A Nation, Browns Lose As Usual
With all the excitement over the big stimulus package that was the debut of Brady Quinn and the return of Kellen Winslow — turns out they're real, and they're fantastic — we all ignored the real issues: Jay Cutler and Brandon McDonald. The shy, self-effacing Broncos quarterback threw for 447 yards a...
Morning Blogdome: Where's Your Bear Bryant Now?
So let it be written to [email protected]. So let it be done. • Saban parted the Red Sea because his next job was on the other side: Gosh, it's been almost 15 years since Alabama won a national title. Raise your hand if you feel sorry for them? Anyone? Anyone....? [Bleacher Report] • The balls ...
When All Else Fails, Imply That They're Gay
The war of words between Joey Porter and, oh, everybody went from moderately amusing barbs to junior high homosexual jokes, which is typical in the hypersensitive, homophobic world of professional football players. When Porter questioned the NFL allowing Jaguars receiver Matt Jones to still play aft...
Chicago Fans Remain Classy Even When It Comes To Soccer
I'm not sure whether this represents a particular disdain for ESPN, or if Chicago fans just enjoy flipping the bird in general ... I'm guessing the latter. One thing we do know: The time of Boston sports dominance really does appear to be over. As I'm sure you're aware, Chicago beat New England on T...
Welcome the New Brown Prince of Football....
In just a couple of hours Brady Quinn will ditch the clipboard and gallantly sprint to the front of the huddle to rescue the Cleveland Browns from their 3-5 misery. Americans who have the NFL Network as part of their premium cable packages will scrutinize his poise, his arm strength, and some will ...
Will John Daly's Drunken Antics Result in His Beloved Hooters Firing Him?
Last week, John Daly denied initial reports that he had drank himself into a catatonic state at a local Hooters in North Carolina, using the excuse that "he sleeps with his eyes open" and a worried bus driver merely overreacted. After his time in the drunk tank, Daly spoke with Golf.com about the in...
Fox Attack Victim Courageously Steps Forward With Harrowing Tale Of Survival
The identity of the Prescott, Ariz. fox attack victim has finally been revealed. Here is Michelle Felicetta, who agreed to step forward today so that her harrowing tale might serve as a warning to others who travel in fox-infested areas. We caution you that the details of her ordeal are not for the ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while you "accidentally" steal someone's car ... • College Football: Maryland Terrapins at Virginia Tech Hokies (7:30 p.m., ET) Something is definitely hokey here. [ESPN] • College Football: TCU Horned Frogs at Utah Utes (8:00 p.m., ET) Great horny toads! [CBS College Sports No one get...
Who Can Reassemble The Smoldering Rubble That Is The Oakland Raiders?
As bad as things are going for the San Francisco 49ers this season, they aren't even close to being the most dysfunctional football team in the Bay Area. Just how bad are things in Raiderland, on a scale of 1 to Armageddon? Cornerback Nnamdi Asomugha (pictured) and safety Gibril Wilson are now talki...
Will There Be Blood?
New York City Deadspin readers: Grab your chap books and gird your loins, because tonight is the Varsity Letters Reading extravaganza you've all been waiting for. Watch Drew Magary share the tiny, cloistered-off section of a bar to read from "Men With Balls" along side one-time nemesis and blog blo...
Lute Olson Soap Opera Gets A Little More Creepy
It's safe to say that the last couple years of Lute Olson's life have been difficult. Health problems and a nasty public divorce led him to miss most of last season on the bench at Arizona and walk out on his team just before this one began. But it seems that the split from his wife, Christine, is e...
Afternoon Blogdome: Why Does Hank?
• Trade bait: Kendra Wilkinson has gone from being a Bunny to an Eagle. (Or will soon be married to one, anyway.) Think of the money she'll save on Viagra and smelling salts. [Sports Crackle Pop] • Money for nothing: Credit problems? Go hit a hole in one and win a million dollars like this guy did. ...
Steve Spurrier Inspires Great Art
This one I call, Man Being Aggressively Clawed By Chicken. But it's not that at all. It is of course South Carolina coach and football god Steve Spurrier, who just happens to inspire the artist in all of us. In this portrait he is watched over by the SC Gamecock, just as St. Michael the archangel wa...
Cheerleaders Show School Spirit Through Streaking
Please keep the following two things in mind before commenting on this post. 1) These are high school girls and 2) They're from Canada. That's not an excuse or an explanation for why they stripped down to their panties, duct taped their boobs, and streaked across a football field in the middle of a ...