people Page 91 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Gary Coleman Would Not Like To Apologize For His Actions
In other scandal-ridden relationship news, Gary Coleman overcompensates for his short stature by telling "The Insider" round table to promptly go fuck themselves....

And The Crowd Goes <em>Meh</em>: A Gallery Of Bored People At The Slam Dunk Contest
Gawker.TV's David Matthews watched Saturday's dunk contest and collected all the indifferent reaction shots of a crowd that seemed to think it was watching the Bob Hope Classic. Here's Dwyane Wade, dislocating his own jaw out of sheer boredom. [Gawker.TV]...

People Fainting On Live Television Will Never Cease To Amuse
Batista is a Brazilian soccer commentator who got a little woozy during a recent broadcast. Note the expression shortly before his eyes roll upward. It's the look of someone who knows he's about to be all over YouTube. [Unprofessional Foul]...

And On The Fourth Day, Bryce Harper Homered
Here's the Chosen One, taking some weak Arizona Western stuff deep in his fourth game as a collegian. Watch closely and you might see the ball transmute into pure light somewhere over Lake Mead. [YouTube, Las Vegas Review-Journal]...

Three Words No NFLer Wants To Hear: Transgender Sodomy Lawsuit
Cornerback Eric Green, who's bounced around from practice squad to practice squad since being released by the Cardinals after last season, was hit with a lawsuit from a transgendered woman who claims Green forcibly sodomized her....

A Children's Treasury Of Bizarre Injuries
The Sun-Sentinel has put online a database of more than 374,000 emergency room visits. We present some highlights from the worlds of sports, sex and...other....

Rick Majerus: Serial Child Squasher
Last week, we ran a post that exposed SLU head basketball coach Rick Majerus as someone who enjoys shitting on towels and sitting on campers. Here are MORE stories of Majerus', uh, largesse....

Scottie Pippen Would <u>Not</u> Like To Thank All The Little People
Pippen was attacked by little people. Pippen sent one of the little people to the hospital. This is a thing that happened....

Sissies, Drunk Yoga And The Last Pure Football Game: A Dispatch From Harvard-Yale
Deadspin correspondent Craig Fehrman went to the 126th edition of Harvard-Yale, where he confronted both the overwrought mythology of The Game and the overexposure of at least one penis....

Crazy Old Man Gives Bills The Bird
Unfortunately, that grumpy coot just happens to be the owner of the Tennessee Titans and his affinity for the ol' double deuce is now immortalized on YouTube. If you have hands, feel free to nervously wring them....

Old People Fantasy Football Is Adorable
A Massachusetts nursing home has started a fantasy football league for its residents, to give them something to do on Sundays. If their teams are anything like mine, that "something to do" is likely "wishing for death."...

The Final FAILgate: Please Pick The Most Pathetic Winning Entry
So here is the final FAILgate for this year, replete with a voting poll where you, Deadspin nation, will get to decide which lucky individual walks home with the coveted "Deadspin Prize Pack."...

Hockey Players Love The Feel Of Ice On Bare Skin
A junior hockey team in Idaho was banned from the local rink after imitating their NHL idols and holding their own "strip shootout." I guess if the Tampa Bay Lightning jumped off a bridge, you would do that too? [WSOCTV]...

Fans, Media Recruited (And Manipulated) In Fight Over Televised Sports (Updated)
Some media outlets want you to rage against a new lobbying organization that claims to represent sports fans, but is actually a front for satellite companies looking to destroy cable TV sports. But who is really manipulating who here?...

Sore Hamstrings? Get Your Legs Amputated!
Ultra-marathon runners have terrible problems with their toenails, so some choose to get them permanently removed. Or! And I'm just throwing this out there....don't run 150-mile foot races? [NYTimes]...

God Bless Ronan Tynan’s Anti-Semitism
If you're heading to Yankee Stadium for Game 1 of the ALCS tonight, you can forget about hearing Ronan Tynan sing "God Bless America" during the seventh inning. Know why? Because he hates Jews! WOOHOO!...

Little People Racing As Deserving An Olympic Sport As I've Seen
If beer commercials and 80s movies are to be believed, everything's bigger in Australia. Except the jockeys; they're little people. And the horses; they're regular size people....

This Week in Love
Alright, time to commence my weekly scan of the interwebs to see who got engaged recently. Let's see, there's Ricky Williams and Kristen Barnes. There's also Jim from The Office and Emily Blunt (slow down, you two!). And......

A Small Way To Liven Up Any Fantasy Draft
You might've missed this fantasy football draft over the weekend, and it's your loss. Like many, it took place in a hotel room. But unlike most, it featured those two magic little words: midget strippers....

Why Your Team Sucks: Green Bay Packers
Some people are fans of the Green Bay Packers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Green Bay Packers. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....