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Referee: Irate José Mourinho Cussed Me Out In Dressing Room
Earlier this week, England’s Football Association gave José Mourinho a fine and a one-match ban from the sideline for some sort of behavior that got him sent to the stands during halftime of Chelsea’s 1-2 loss to West Ham. Now we know exactly why: it was because Mourinho freaked the fuck out on the ...
Wins Were All José Mourinho Ever Had To Stand On
The only thing more unfathomable than a historically great manager having his job status seriously questioned just half a season removed from a title, is said manager and club falling apart so thoroughly that the speculation about his imminent demise begins to appear justified. And yet this is exact...
José Mourinho Banned, Sued, And Is Reportedly About To Be Sacked
So Chelsea fans, do you want the bad news, the awful news, or the terrible news first?...
More Proof Gerard Deulofeu Is A Brilliant Lunatic
Here are some highlights from Everton vs. Sunderland, which ended 6-2 in favor of the Toffees thanks in large part to some astounding play from their absurdly gifted young winger, Gerard Deulofeu:...
Arsenal Might Be The Real Deal
Since that beatdown on Manchester United a couple weeks ago, it’s been hard to avoid the sense that this just might be Arsenal’s year. With Chelsea’s continued horrendous form so far this season, United’s unimpressive performances undermining their point total, Liverpool’s lack of consistency, and M...
Gerard Deulofeu Is Kind Of A Nutcase But I Love Him All The Same
If the whole of Arsenal’s 2-1 win over Everton this weekend left me with any lasting impression, it was that I should give more respect to the Gunners’ budding title charge; they more or less coasted to another three points against formidable opposition, the sort of thing they’ve seemed capable of i...
Daniel Sturridge Has No Luck
If you wanted more proof that Daniel Sturridge is cursed with terrible, rotten, no-good luck, here you go: after finally returning to action about a month ago after last spring’s hip surgery, the Liverpool striker is set to miss his third consecutive match with knee discomfort and will undergo a sca...
David Moyes Belongs In The Premier League
David Moyes, the once-esteemed former manager of Everton and Manchester United, is in trouble. After getting run out of the biggest job in the Premier League in humiliating fashion, he fled to the relatively calm shores of Basque Country. There, he sought to rehabilitate his career with ambitious an...
Manchester United Are (Sort Of) For Real, Apparently
By losing to a surprisingly rampant Arsenal in their previous league game before the international break, Manchester United more or less confirmed our sneaking suspicions about this team’s place in the EPL hierarchy. Their spot in the table may make them technically contenders but there still remain...
Klopp In
From the moment former Liverpool manager Brendan Rodgers was fired, Jurgen Klopp’s now-completed move to the club was an open secret. And yet it still took seeing him at that trademark new signing table, a pen-cradling hand hovering over some papers, to really believe that a true superstar manager l...
Alexis Sánchez And Mesut Özil Are Better Than Everyone
It’s telling that, as impressive as the sheer all-encompassing nature of Arsenal’s domination of Manchester United this weekend, what was even more stunning was the shock of it all....
José Mourinho's Self-Regard Grows In Inverse Proportion To Chelsea's Record
Hey remember when David Moyes coached United for a year, everyone agreed it was an unmitigated disaster, and it became the standard by which to measure all EPL meltdowns? José Mourinho, the little tyrant man who will probably get fired from the USMNT someday, and Chelsea have started this season thr...
Chelsea Players Starting To Rebel Against José Mourinho
It was inevitable that Chelsea’s astoundingly poor performances and results so far this season would lead to some level of internal strife inside the club. We now have confirmation of this, with sources in the team describing a rift between the players and José Mourinho to two different papers....
Tottenham’s Beatdown Of Manchester City Was A Long Time In The Making
The story of the Premier League season thus far has been the sudden and unexpected ascent of a number of Britain’s historically smaller teams, the likes of Leicester and West Ham and Crystal Palace and Swansea. These are teams that fans of the league’s big boys would’ve penciled in as easy Ws just a...
This Is A Good Fan
We’d be up to the same were we Sunderland supporters....
Diego Costa And José Mourinho Are The Shitheads We Need
The more you think about it the more inevitable it seems that José Mourinho—the ne plus ultra of managerial shit-talking, barb-throwing, and incessant needling of rivals—and Diego Costa—his dispositional equivalent on the field, only with elbows substituted for verbal barbs as his projectile of choi...
Bournemouth's Matt Ritchie Hammers Home One Of The Season's Most Astounding Goals
Not content to let Callum Wilson have all the glory, AFC Bournemouth’s Matt Ritchie delivered this mind-altering strike to put his side up 2-0 against a hapless Sunderland side today. We feel pretty confident that this will stand up as one of the Premiership season’s best goals....
Liverpool Shooting Themselves In The Foot By Not Taking Europa League Seriously
Last weekend, Liverpool lost in sorry fashion to Manchester United, their hated foe and rival for one of the Premier League’s all-important top four spots. That result, plus the draw with Arsenal a couple weeks prior, likely shut the door on what in the best of cases would’ve been an unlikely run to...
Manchester City Are Soaring In England; Now They Must Fly As High In Europe
Manchester City appear to be on the precipice of something great. Years of unstinting investment by their rich owners has already paid off domestically in the form of two Premier League titles in four seasons, plus what in all likelihood will be a third come the end of the current campaign. But any ...
Victor Moses's Breakaway Was An Emotional Roller Coaster
You know that feeling when you step into traffic without looking, only for your friend to pull you back right as a car speeds right past where you almost stood, wind blowing into your gratefully stunned face? That’s probably how Victor Moses felt after Dimitri Payet sent home a rebound at the end of...