sports Page 832 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Kris Humphries: Douchebag Homophobe
Kris Humphries is out indefinitely with a shoulder injury while the Nets continue to slide, losing their fifth straight last night to the Pacers....

Yep, It Looks Like A Wisconsin Assistant Coach Ate A Booger At The Rose Bowl
We think this is Wisconsin assistant coach Joe Rudolph pulling a Spaulding in the first quarter of the Rose Bowl; here it is in full forensic-quality slow-mo and zoomed-in just for your enjoyment. [ESPN]...

Spelling Is Still A Challenge In Georgia
Inside joke? A reference to something Georgia fans would understand? Or just dumbasses who can't spell their team's diminutive? ...

The Capital One Bowl Brought Us The Rare Defensive PAT
You won't see this play in the No Fun League (defenses cannot score on a PAT in the NFL) but college football still permits the glory that is sprinting the length of the field with a measly two points as reward, an opportunity of which South Carolina's Stephon Gilmore made the most....

Brian Urlacher's Injury Horrified His Teammates, Brought Them To Prayer
Bears All-Pro linebacker Brian Urlacher opened the new year with an MCL sprain, though his reaction was so terrifying teammates fell to their knees in prayer. From DeKalb's Daily Chronicle:...

Drayton Florence Saved The Best For Last In Earning NFL Flop Of The Season Honors
Bills cornerback Drayton Florence has made a career out of his tough-guy image (just ask Mark Sanchez) but the stunt he pulled Sunday against the New England Patriots puts him firmly in Italian soccer star territory. It was less a flop or dive and more of a hurl—a leaping, falling charade of nonse...

Michael Beasley Did Not React Well To Seeing His Injured Finger
In the context of today's injuries, this one's relatively tame—but Michael Beasley's "Oh shit! That's my bone!" reaction to a finger injury (reports say it was a laceration, one patched up with a few stitches) is priceless. ...
![Oh No, Z-Bo! [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Oh No, Z-Bo! [UPDATE]
Grizzlies star Zach Randolph went down hard in a painful collision with teammate O.J. Mayo in the first quarter of Memphis' matchup tonight with the Bulls in Chicago. Amateur surgeons online are already claiming an ACL tear and that Z-Bo's season is over, though he later headed to the locker room ...

This Time, It's The Rim That Rejected Kris Humphries
How unpopular is Kris Humphries? His wife is ripping him on Twitter, random people hate him, and New Yorkers are booing him....

Here's Another One Of Those 105-Yard Kickoff Returns We Were Told We'd Never See Again
When the NFL moved kickoffs up prior to the start of the season, long returns were nearly declared extinct. While the number of return TDs is down significantly, there have been a good number of surprises, like this one from San Diego's Richard Goodman. [CBS]...

Something Appears To Be Wrong With Chris Kuper's Ankle
That's Denver Broncos offensive lineman Chris Kuper with a left ankle pointing about 90 degrees in the wrong direction. He can expect a call about post-career opportunities soon from Tim Krumrie....

David Akers Is Now Throwing Touchdown Passes
We're not sure if this says more for Jim Harbaugh's shrewdness or the Rams' general ineptitude, but this fake field goal completion from David Akers to Michael Crabtree was a pass even Tim Tebow would have completed. That having been said, the fake was so good it even fooled the broadcast truck. [...

Helmet-To-Helmet Tackles Are Especially Painful If You're Not Wearing A Helmet
Forgive Houston's Bryan Braman for trying to make an impact on the game and impress the Texans coaching staff, but the undrafted rookie from West Texas A & M ended up making an impression on his skull via impact with the helmet of Titans punt returner Marc Mariani. Top that, James Harrison. [CBS]...

Your Dumbass NFL Play Of The Season Stars Packers KR Pat Lee
The Packers' usual kick returner is Randall Cobb, but he's out with an injury. In stepped Pat Lee, who has completely bungled his kick returns so far today—the most egregious example of which came after Detroit's opening touchdown in which Lee drops the ball out of the end zone, then downs it back...

Sunderland's Ji Dong-Won Delivers Last-Second Winning Goal, Then Makes Out With A Fan
Sunderland continued a giant-killing weekend in the English Premier League by stunning Manchester City in the final seconds of stoppage time with a goal by Ji Dong-Won....

Let's Celebrate The New Year With Auburn's Statue Of Liberty Play
There's never a bad time for a trick play, and Auburn tied up the Chick-Fil-A Bowl in Atlanta with a picture-perfect Statue of Liberty. Happy New Year in the United States of Football. [ESPN]...

Northwestern Coach Pat Fitzgerald Is Wondering Why God Has Forsaken Him
The Meineke Care Care Bowl Of Texas became the scene of a spiritual crisis for Northwestern head coach Pat Fitzgerald, as he sought divine explanations for a momentum-killing tripping penalty. [ESPN]...

10 Stories Of 2011 That Didn't Suck: A SportsFeat List
Max Linsky is the editor of Longform and SportsFeat....

ESPN's SkyCam Becomes Self-Aware, Starts Attacking Iowa Players
It was bound to happen eventually: the wire-suspended ESPN SkyCam came crashing to the ground late in Friday's Insight Bowl in Tempe, nearly decapitating Iowa's Marvin McNutt and leaving the Worldwide Leader's Sean McDonough to apologize with a sheepish "Sorry folks."...

Brock Lesnar Just Retired From UFC. Here's Why (And The Official Announcement)
Here's the shot from Alistair Overeem that knocked Brock Lesnar out of UFC (along with Lesnar's announcement that made it official). The announcement seems to have come a fight too late, given how miserably Lesnar managed to defend himself against Overeem's strikes. Bon voyage, real-then-fake-then-r...