york Page 224 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

John Tortorella Has Had Just About Enough Of Your Damn Questions
We'll keep it in the room, Stan....

These "Rangers Vs. Nets" Tickets For Tonight Look Legit
Fifteen rows back from the glass, right on the blue line, guy's asking 150 a pop, barely half of face value? You'd be a fool not to snap these up, unless you want to to miss Kris Humphries posting up on Ryan McDonagh. [@Lock]...

Devils Launch "Don't Sell Tickets To Rangers Fans" Campaign
Compared to the old place at the Meadowlands, the Prudential Center is clean and modern...and really, really easy to get to from New York City. This tends to lead to the Rock being lousy with Rangers fans, something that could get a little embarrassing come playoff time. So the Devils aren't going t...

Some Poor Bastard's Cell Phone Went Off During John Tortorella's Press Conference, And Torts Was Not Happy
John Tortorella's press conferences are the stuff of legend: tense, terse legend. At least from the media side, they're more amusing than hostile. But there's going to come a day when the Rangers aren't winning, and the scribes are going to refer to their mental tally of all the times Torts bullie...

Rex Ryan Is Not (As) Fat
That's him at a Jets charity function over the weekend. Holy shit....

Osi Umenyiora Wishes "Twitter Gangster" LeSean McCoy A Happy Mother's Day...On Twitter
So, yeah. Osi Umenyiora recently joined Twitter and it would appear he is a quick learner (except for the whole "@ reply" thing). Earlier this morning he tweeted "Happy Mothers Day Lesean Mccoy! Enjoy your special day!!"...

Andy Pettitte Makes First Start Since Retiring Before The Original Roger Clemens Perjury Trial
Earlier in the week, Jon Heyman wrote something silly about Andy Pettitte not being trustworthy anymore because he said something potentially helpful for Roger Clemens, while being cross-examined by Roger Clemens's lawyer. Never mind that that is kind of the point of cross examination, but why not ...

It Was "Anal Kid Time" At Yankee Stadium Tonight
Reader Tommy went to tonight's Rays-Yanks game in the Bronx tonight, and noticed the captioning board was advertising a very strange event. If you ask me, they're making baseball stadiums way too kid-friendly these days....

Miami Heat Apologize For "Extinguishing" Amar'e Stoudamire
This is what happens when an otherwise personality-less P.A. announcer tries to show a bit of personality. The Miami Heat have now formally apologized for "extinguishing" Amar'e Stoudamire after his sixth foul last night....

Lifelong Yankees Fan Tim Tebow Will Rename His Dog "Bronx"
Tim Tebow's dog used to be named Bronco. In fact, that's been his name for the past year and a half, since Tebow got him. But now Tebow plays for the New York Jets, so his name is going to be changed to "Bronx," for reasons that aren't yet entirely clear. Is it football season yet?...

After Amar'e Stoudemire Fouled Out, He Was Gonna Help Shane Battier Up, But ... Nah
Last night, we showed you how the Heat's PA guy made a corny reference to Stoudemire being "extinguished from the game" when he fouled out. But this video shows you what happens at the end of that clip, when Amar'e decides to lend a helping hand before he doesn't....

The Heat PA Guy Announced Amar'e Stoudemire Fouling Out As "He Has Been Extinguished From The Game"
Ha! Ha! Get it? Because he severely injured his hand punching a fire extinguisher! You're winning friends the right way, Miami Heat. (We isolated the arena audio track so you can hear it more easily.) [TNT]...

CBC's Ron MacLean Attempts Tortured Comparison Of Hockey Players To 9/11 First Responders, Fails
CBC host Ron MacLean opened tonight's coverage of the Stanley Cup playoff Game Six bout between the Capitals and Rangers with an extended and tortuous metaphor claiming the players were "like firefighters, like police officers," and throwing in 9/11 references....

Bristolmetrics: <em>SportsCenter</em> Said "Fire Extinguisher" More Times Than "Kobe Bryant" Last Week
This is a regular feature breaking down, minute-by-minute, the content that appears on ESPN's 11 p.m. edition of SportsCenter throughout the week. Graphic by Jim Cooke....

What If Every Pitcher In Baseball Were Mariano Rivera?
Trying to compare Mariano Rivera to other pitchers is like trying to compare a photon to other sprinters. Out for out, the difference between him and Pedro Martinez is the difference between Pedro and a league-average player. He hasn't had a full season much better or worse than any other, but he's ...

Fans Are Not Permitted In The Fountains At Kauffman Stadium. This Fan Did Not Care.
When Humberto Quintero's home-run ball bounced over the heads of the fans in left-center yesterday afternoon, it wound up out of play for anyone hoping to snag a souvenir. But one audacious guy would not be deterred; he was unconcerned with fences, warning signs, or consequences of any sort. He kick...

Former New York Yankee Great Jim Leyritz Will Be At A Penn Station Bookstore Next Thursday
Here's something: A bookstore in the commuter centrifuge that is Penn Station will host a Jim Leyritz book signing event for a book—Catching Heat—that came out almost a year ago....

Amar'e Stoudemire To Start For Knicks In Game 4 Against Miami Heat
Less than a week after "half his hand was just hanging off" Amar'e will start for the Knicks today in what will most likely be New York's final game of the season....

Eli Manning Has A Banana For A Penis
Eli Manning's appearance hosting Saturday Night Live last night was passable, lacking any real groaner moments but nothing especially memorable, either. Well, except for Manningbananapenis....

Amar'e Stoudemire Shows Why You Should Never, Ever Punch A Fire Extinguisher Case
We all knew Amar'e Stoudemire's hand must've been messed up when we saw him walking out of Miami, arm in sling and slated for surgery the next day. Today, he tweeted out some visual evidence of what it looks like one punches a metal fire extinguisher case and the case wins....