The Athletic Can't Stop Humping Useless Butter Coffee

Here’s a question: What would happen if you combined the vapidity of ubiquitous trend pieces about athletes eating and drinking things with the cravenness of brand subservience? You’d probably end up with something like this article from The Athletic.

On one level, the point of this article is simply to pretend like the fact that Nick Foles is no longer around to brew coffee for the rest of the Eagles is at all noteworthy—much the same way other practitioners of this form have tried to pretend that athletes drinking water is noteworthy. On another, stupider level, it is meant to provide free publicity for a dumb snake oil company:

Foles’ devotion to coffee, and specifically Bulletproof coffee, has become legendary in the Eagles’ building. He was almost evangelical about it, brewing coffee for teammates and coaches and sharing the health benefits. (Foles officially partnered with Bulletproof 360 Inc. in July.) Mike Groh used to find it waiting on his desk in the morning. Brandon Brooks had a care package sent to him after Foles left for Florida.

“There’s definitely a lot of coffee around the room that Nick played a big part in,” quarterbacks coach Press Taylor said.

Bulletproof Coffee is a product created by hucksters who have spent years selling people on the idea that putting butter and expensive MCT oils into their coffee is the key to living a healthy lifestyle. The entire enterprise has been debunked repeatedly— Gizmodo did so way back in 2015!—and we are long past the time when anyone, particularly a journalist, should be taking any Bulletproof Coffee products seriously.

What’s really weird is that this isn’t even the first time that The Athletic has used Foles’s partnership with the company as an excuse to run friendly press for it. Just last month, The Athletic’s new sports business vertical ran an entire article about Foles’s love for stupid butter coffee, and the whole thing read like a press release. This is all that article had to say about the fact that the oily butter coffee is useless:

Of course, Bulletproof is not without its critics. Peruse YouTube, or just search “Bulletproof and science,” and scores of results emerge from those who argue Asprey is a quack with no scientific training or evidence to support his practices and diets.

To them, he offered thanks.

“I absolutely love the critics,” he said. “And my general response to them is just three words: say my name. Because I’m a New York Times bestselling science author. And my books have hundreds, or some have thousands of references. And if you can stand here and look at me and say there’s no science behind my recommendations, it’s exceptionally clear what’s going on. It’s called ego. And it’s not my ego that’s involved.”

Everything about sports media is so embarrassing.