It's true: Tony Romo did fall into a pond at the American Century Championship. And was rescued by a hockey player. But practically no one noticed, as Jessica Simpson was rocking the white dress with the orange whoozits and wowing the crowd with her intellectual prowess. Typical exchange: "Jessica! Can I have your autograph?" Jessica: "Suuure!"
Multiply this by about 600, with not a single variation. It's almost as if Romo has indeed dumped her, and is using a Jessica robot for public appearances. Said one onlooker: "Being stupid is apparently not an act." Jessica was on hand all weekend, and had a private VIP booth on the 17th hole. On Saturday, she walked down the fairway with Romo on the 18th, and then the two quickly left the course; even though Romo had promised to stay for a press conference (he was in second place at the time).
Was it fair to allow Jessica on the premises to begin with? Kids show up to get an autograph from Michael Jordan and Wayne Gretzky, and end up with giant white bazooms right at eye level. Welcome to Tahoe: Puberty comes two years early.
But not for the fellow below: He has eyes for only one man. Is there anything sadder than a guy wearing a Brady Quinn jersey watching Charles Barkley golf? I suspect the answer is no. You have to admire this lad, though; with star quarterbacks such as Romo, Ben Roethlisberger and John Elway on the premises, he decided to represent the brown-and-orange and his No. 1 man, who wasn't even at the event. You keep it real, Brady Quinn fan! (Is later found bloody and pummeled on the beach).
(Jessica Simpson photo by Dan Thrift, Tahoe Daily Tribune)
Former Major League Pitcher Overtakes Quinn To Win Seventh American Century [Tahoe Daily Tribune]