The Human Being Vs. The Publicist

A legitimate question as we tie a big ribbon on this whole Terrell Owens suicide business for the day, which, we have to say, ESPN has done a rather outstanding — if predictably overdone — job of covering today:

Is Kim Etheredge the worst publicist of all time, or is she merely a decent human being? And, perhaps more pressing: Is it possible that she's the former because she's the latter?

Let's take a look again at the facts that we know from the police report, which, no matter how many people try to tell you otherwise, has absolutely no reason to lie. (Unless, of course, it's an O.J.-style frame job to convince the world that Owens is suicidal. Hey, it's Texas, it's possible.)

Etheredge, Owens' personal publicist, found him last night disoriented and/or overdosing on medication. She told police that he said he was "depressed" and that a prescription for 40 pain bills had been filled earlier that week. Before this exact incident, Owens had taken five pain pills. Etheredge now realized they were all gone, and she watched Owens put two pills in his mouth, which she tried to extract. The police, witnessing the empty bottle, asked him if he had taken them. He said "yes." He was asked if he was trying to harm himself. He said "yes."

These are the facts: There is no way police could have gotten any of this information from anyone other than Etheredge. And there is no reason for them to lie.

Today, Etheredge, no longer a panicked woman afraid her friend and/or star client was about to die, put the personal publicist hat back on and denied everything that the police said. Their information, of course, came directly from her in the first place. And she is saying it didn't happen. As is Owens.

So, the question you have to ask here: Which Kim Etheredge do you trust more?

Do you trust the one who witnessed a man that she sees every day — presumably cares for, cleans up after, pampers — overdosing on 30-plus pain pills and immediately calls 9-1-1, telling paramedics in a panic that he was trying to kill himself?

Or do you trust the one who realized that she's not a human being: She's a publicist, and her job is to make Terrell Owens look like everything is just fine?

Do you trust the human, or do you trust the publicist? Where you stand on that issue will give you a pretty good idea whether or not Terrell Owens attempted to kill himself last night. Because if it really was just an allergic reaction, and the only reason anybody is saying "depression" and "suicide" is because she told the police that ... heavens, there has never, ever been a worse publicist than Kim Etheredge.

Terrell Owens Police Report [The Smoking Gun]