The Inexorable Pussification Of Little League Marches On

A 12-year-old boy thought it would be cool to break out the pop-up slide — and tore up his knee in the process. This being America, of course his family sued. So how much money did they get?

After little Martin Gonzalez of Staten Island unwisely tried to stretch a single into a double and shredded his meniscus and ligaments, his mother contended that anyone but her son was at fault because he hadn't been taught how to slide properly.

The suit...names as defendants the New Springville Little League; the boy's manager, Leigh Bernstein; Little League Baseball Incorporated and "John Doe," a fictitious name for the unidentified first-base coach. The amount of monetary damages sought is not specified.

Good thing that first base coach got to remain anonymous. No kid is going to listen to him when he's waving you around first if two surgeries are a possible outcome.

Little League just paid $125,000 to make this go away, money that is sure to be made up by cutting back on player luxuries like "Neosporin" and "insurance."

None of this would have happened if he had bought Tim Raines's instructional video. If you've got cocaine vials in your back pocket, head-first is the only way to slide. Meiers Corners Mom Files Suit Against Son's Little League And Coaches [Staten Island Advance] Staten Island Mom Settles Suit With Little League And Coaches Over Knee Injury [Staten Island Advance]