The Only Fun Miami Marlin Is Probably Better At Basketball
Even in a shamelessly slow offseason, the Miami Marlins have clobbered all competitors in a race to become the least interesting team in baseball. They traded Giancarlo Stanton, who is possibly the most exciting dude in the entire sport, for peanuts. The main goal, which the team barely bothered to conceal, was not having to pay him anymore. Pretty much every other useful player on the roster either already has been or is rumored to soon be dealt. All this, for no clear reason than the brand-new owners’ wish to to reduce payroll.
Finally, however, the Marlins have acquired a guy who’s actually kind of interesting: Monte Harrison, a 22-year-old outfield prospect, who joined the team from Milwaukee as part of the Christian Yelich trade. He’s not the most notable prospect in the deal—that would be fellow outfielder Lewis Brinson, a consensus top-25 prospect in the minors—but Harrison may well be the coolest. If you’ve heard of him at all, you probably know him best as the minor leaguer who took his shirt off at first base while celebrating a home run in an all-star game. But as Jake Mintz points out, Harrison is also an extremely talented all-around athlete. Besides smacking dongs in the minor leagues as a prospect, Harrison was also a good enough football player in high school to commit to Nebraska. Coolest of all, though, is the fact that Harrison can dunk the hell out of a basketball.
There’s a Youtube video from 2014 titled “MONTE HARRISON IS THE TOP ATHLETE IN THE COUNTRY,” and truthfully, it makes a strong case. His vertical leap is so gargantuan that it’s hard not to wonder how baseball could really be Harrison’s best option.
Alienated Marlins fans: This cool mixtape is pretty much all you’re got right now. Enjoy it.
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