The Six Storylines You're Already Sick Of

Because we're all gonna be hearing every single storyline between now and two freaking weeks from now, let's go ahead and run the obvious ones down, right here, to get 'em out of the way.

After this, you can officially shut off the TV until February 3.

• The Patriots are attempting to become the first undefeated team since 1972. • Bill Belichick can become the second coach ever to win four Super Bowls. • Eli Manning is the younger brother of Peyton Manning, who won the Super Bowl last year. • The Giants and Patriots played each other in Week 17, in one of the most entertaining games of the year. It also might have rejuvenated the Giants to make their Super Bowl run. • Boston and New York are known as historical rivals. • The Giants have not lost away from Giants Stadium since Week 1.

There. They'll be beaten to death over the next two weeks. Those six topics will be probed through every orifice for a fortnight. So read 'em now, and we can all move on.

Early bed for us tonight: Bookstores open early tomorrow, after all.