Watch Russia's Greatest Sports Hero Get Wrecked By Team USA

Game recognizes game, so we'll concede that Vladislav Tretiak, who just helped light the Olympic cauldron, is one of the greatest goaltenders to ever skate the Earth. As we anxiously wonder when the hell Olympic hockey is going to start, let's also concede that the 1980 men's team had his number.

Tretiak, a Hockey Hall of Famer, went to Lake Placid the undisputed best netminder in the world. In their medal round match-up, the U.S. scored on him twice in just eight shots. Above, the first-period goals from Buzz Schneider and Mark Johnson, which caused furious head coach Viktor Tikhonov to pull Tretiak at the intermission. (After the loss Tikhonov allegedly singled out Tretiak and told him "This is your loss." Years later, Tikhonov would say benching Tretiak was the biggest mistake of his life.)

Tretiak would win three Olympic golds and 10 World Championships in his career, more than enough to qualify him to light the torch alongside racist figure skating lady. But still: USA! USA! USA! etc.