Who Dare Oppose The Flailing Fists Of Fury?

Ah, the windmill. Once a devastating fighting maneuver featured in middle schools everywhere, it has fallen out of favor in recent years, and is now nearly extinct in the wild. The only place one can see it currently is in Popeye cartoons or Spanish soccer, the latter which recently gave us the somewhat hilarious brawl above. Our verdict: Needs a musical soundtrack.

But what Europeans lack in fighting skill, they more than make up for in sportswriting flair. From the Guardian Unlimited:

In the final minute, Carlos Diogo trod on Luis Fabiano's hand, sparking a bit of head-rubbing, a lot of bad-mouthing and then a proper bout of fisticuffs, full of comedy windmilling and a superb right hook from Diogo that left Fabiano sprawling across the turf like Bambi on ice. It was a "disgrace", screamed Marca, "a street brawl from the lowest 'hood'". Not that it was all their fault: someone really should have told them it was Twelfth Night, not Boxing Day.

Let's see you knock out a graph like that on your Blackberry, Stephen A.

Update: And here's the soundtrack we requested. Plus, a stirring fan recreation somewhere in Madrid. Update: Not surprisingly, David Stern has suspended both players.

Fans Feast On A Kings Banquet [Guardian Unlimited]